Private Messages
#2104 - 03/07/03 07:47 AM
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Kimbo
Reged: 02/28/03
Posts: 114
Loc: Edmonton, AB, Canada
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I have noticed that there's a section to send private messages but for some reason, I can't. Is there a particular reason for this? Is it not active? It would be nice to chat when people are online. (HI SHARON!) 
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Hi - I've disabled the private message function, but I can re-enable it if people would really like this. I have seen this function abused on other message boards, and didn't want that to happen, but people have been so warm and friendly on these boards that's probably not such a risk. The other reason was that I count on the boards to help lighten my email load, and I was afraid that if I allowed private messaging I would be getting tons of those instead of people posting.
If we get a lot of requests for this function I'll enable it for a trial run and see how things go.
Best,
Heather
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Heather is the Administrator of the IBS Message Boards. She is the author of Eating for IBS and The First Year: IBS, and the CEO of Heather's Tummy Care. Join her IBS Newsletter. Meet Heather on Facebook!
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That sounds great Heather!
Does anybody else want to try it besides me? 
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Okay, I've never used the poll function before, so let's see if this works! You should be able to vote on whether you'd like to send and receive private messages. If you couldn't care less, just don't vote one way or the other.
- Heather
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Heather is the Administrator of the IBS Message Boards. She is the author of Eating for IBS and The First Year: IBS, and the CEO of Heather's Tummy Care. Join her IBS Newsletter. Meet Heather on Facebook!
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OK - so here's why I think it would be a good idea:
! - you really need to talk to someone (ie: crisis)
! - you're having trouble with a recipe and suddenly a Cooking Angel comes online = you can get quick help, instead of having to wait for someone to notice your posting.
Personally, I think are equally important reasons to say Yes & to say No regarding private messages. But it would be nice to choose if a particular situation came up. What does everyone think?
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Heather - Is there a way to manage the private messages, so that you don't get any? (Wondering if you can turn it off just for yourself, or is it an all or nothing...)
I think it might be a nice feature, but don't want you to get swamped with emails.
--H2
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-h2
"Soluble fiber not included."
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Kim and everybody else: I can see a possible problem and dilemma here. What if everyone finds a "board friend" and just privately posts to them, depriving everyone else on the board from helping. I'd say that Heather is the only expert on IBS on this board and if the messages get past her, (where she can't read whatever message she has an inclination to read) then what's the sense in having the board. In everyone's profile is a line for their email address. That's how I've been communicating off-board w/people. Just my TWO CENTS WORTH! 
Sharon
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Sharon
"Anything Chocolate"...that is all!
Edited by SharonMello (03/08/03 08:07 AM)
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Thanks for your input 
I, personally, never considered emailing people - I thought it would be too intrusive - kinda like showing up at their doorstep. That's why I thought PM's would be the next best thing.
I totally agree that health related questions should be directed towards Heather.
In other message boards that I belonged to - PM was a function and it didn't seem to detract from the board postings. That's why I suggested it.
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I agree!
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Kim - I didn't think of that. Maybe I'm paranoid that everybody will do private mail instead of posting to the board. This is my first-ever board, so I'm kinda new to this stuff. I guess if it doesn't work out, Heather can always disable it, right?
Okay, my vote is YES, LET'S TRY.
Sharon
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Sharon
"Anything Chocolate"...that is all!
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So...out of curiosity - when's the polling done? What's the time limit?
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Geez, I don't know. At the end of this week? Not too many people seem to care enough to vote, and I don't know if I should interpret that to mean folks want things to stay the same or don't give a darn if things change and we add the PM. If the results by Friday are for yes, I'll make the bboard change and announce it and we'll give it a try!
- Heather
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Heather is the Administrator of the IBS Message Boards. She is the author of Eating for IBS and The First Year: IBS, and the CEO of Heather's Tummy Care. Join her IBS Newsletter. Meet Heather on Facebook!
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I VOTE YES!!!
I have been over at the IBS Support Groups and I love the PM - I don't think it would stop anyone from posting because the people we would normally PM are the same people we email privately and we still post on the boards.
Just my thought but I truly love it! 
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Lana_Marie
Proud Mommy to Bentley Taylor
Born May 12, 2004 9lbs, 3oz
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LOL - Lana, you are too funny!
I think it would be fun. What ever happened with this poll? It seems the Yes's were higher. 
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I'd like to let things settle down now that the new site is live, as there might be a traffic increase to the boards that I'll need to stay on top of.
Please remind me in a few weeks of the PM issue, and I'll probably enable that function. Honestly, the reason I disabled it in the first place is that it has been so abused on other internet message boards, and I didn't want to make that possible here. But I think we've got a classier crowd...
- H
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Heather is the Administrator of the IBS Message Boards. She is the author of Eating for IBS and The First Year: IBS, and the CEO of Heather's Tummy Care. Join her IBS Newsletter. Meet Heather on Facebook!
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YOU betcha!! We put the Class in Classy!!!
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Lana_Marie
Proud Mommy to Bentley Taylor
Born May 12, 2004 9lbs, 3oz
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yes if everyone wants to.
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ive had ibs for 8 years now. im learning alot on this web board. thanks again everyone
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Heather is the Administrator of the IBS Message Boards. She is the author of Eating for IBS and The First Year: IBS, and the CEO of Heather's Tummy Care. Join her IBS Newsletter. Meet Heather on Facebook!
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same thing happened for me.
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Right now I can't find a way for an individual on the boards to choose to disable private messages for their profile. I'm willing to enable the PM function overall, but only if people have the option to disallow this for their own profile. That way, people who do not want to receive private messages won't.
I'm going to ask my tech guy if there's a way around this. There probably is, and if he can change the code a bit I'll go ahead and enable the PM function overall.
Best,
Heather
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Heather is the Administrator of the IBS Message Boards. She is the author of Eating for IBS and The First Year: IBS, and the CEO of Heather's Tummy Care. Join her IBS Newsletter. Meet Heather on Facebook!
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heather your doing a greatjob. i vote yes on instant messenger.
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ive had ibs for 8 years now. im learning alot on this web board. thanks again everyone
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Just catching up with all these posts! I've always been curious about the PM function,and think it sounds great,its a yes from me
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Morven
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Hi guys! I think private messages could be great. There have been times in the past where I definately would have made use of it. There are some really marvelous people on this board that I am honored to consider friends. HOWEVER, I DO NOT feel we should use the PM feature unless guests have the ability to disable it if they choose. I also have seen this abused on other boards. Yes, we have a lovely bunch at the moment, but you cannot control who visits the site or for what reasons. I have seen people get angry and abusive on other sites when there is a difference of opinion. I kid you not, it does happen. For this reason, I no longer visit this particular site. With the possible increased traffic to Heather's site, I feel we should be cautious about the PM feature. I think Heather deserves our patience on this matter. Why not give her the time she needs to install it properly, where it can be disabled if a member so chooses? I worry that Heather could become extremely overwhelmed. I look forward to using the PM feature; I would wonderful to get to know you all better. I don't mean to be a party pooper, let's just be patient. artist
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I've seen this become a huge problem on other boards too, to the extent that people just leave the boards altogether. Frankly, if I am able to enable this feature with an "opt out" function for folks who don't want it, I'll disable it for my profile, because it defeats the purpose of the boards for me to answer someone privately instead of publicly, where everyone else can see the info too. That's the beauty of the boards from my perspective, and I don't want to lessen that. But I know PMs would be welcomed by many others, so I am looking into a way to get this up and running while still keeping things under control.
Thanks artist.
- H
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Heather is the Administrator of the IBS Message Boards. She is the author of Eating for IBS and The First Year: IBS, and the CEO of Heather's Tummy Care. Join her IBS Newsletter. Meet Heather on Facebook!
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Heather,
On the Support Group Message Boards, the PMing is enabled, but users can choose the option to not accept PM's in their My Home preferances. Shouldn't you be able to do that for these boards also? Or is this not what you meant you wanted?
Thanks!
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I agree. There are all sorts of free email sites, Yahoo and Hotmail and one can set up an email account anytime there, free. If put in ones profile then we can contact them, if not, obviously they don't want to be contacted, their choice. But, I agree with Heather, and we should be able to opt out of it. I honestly thought were were able to already by not checking the private message box, or was I missing something?
Giving credit where credit is due............This, by far the most mannerly group I've ever run across...friendly, caring and concerned. AND, it is the best software for any message boards I've ever seen. We have more options than any I know about to date............even huge message boards don't do what ours does!!! I love it!!!
Kandee
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Kandee - Do you post on the IBS Support Group Boards? If you are registered, and you go into My Home, under your preferences, the last questions is "Accept private messages from other users?" and you choose Yes or No. They have PMing enable. I guess since the IBS Message Boards don't have it enabled, that question doesn't show up under the preferences for IBS Message Boards.
I hope I'm not confusing you!  Or myself for that matter!
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This was a dumb oversight on my part. The private messaging should not have been enabled on the Support Groups board - I just changed that.
I know folks can choose to edit their preferences to not accept private messages, but they have to know how to do this (and they have to know that they CAN do it in the first place). Too many people don't ever even go to my home, or feel comfortable editing their preferences. I don't want them suddenly getting private messages, not liking it, and not knowing what to do about it.
I'm still open to changing this setting in the future, I just really don't want to have to take it away if it doesn't work out and there is abuse of the system. I know that sounds paranoid but there are some really wacky folks on other IBS boards and so far we've managed to keep them away from here. I don't want PMs to be a back door entry way for them.
- H
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Heather is the Administrator of the IBS Message Boards. She is the author of Eating for IBS and The First Year: IBS, and the CEO of Heather's Tummy Care. Join her IBS Newsletter. Meet Heather on Facebook!
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You know what - I was thinking about it, and even though you can choose to not accept any PMs, you probably can't block individual senders, so that's probably better. Anyone wanting to chat with others online would probably be better off using an Instant Messenger such as MS Messenger, AOL Instant Messenger, etc.
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I don't think PMs are a good idea. I think the board is discreet enough b/c of the fact that it's on the computer to begin with. Some questions that some may have, may be a question that somebody else has. I think that I would be more inclined to leave the boards if everything became so private.
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Natalie
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I think PM's are a great idea for the fact that this board is so calm and I don't think that anyone would get harassed by PM's from people they don't want to talk to.
I know on other boards, if a person has trouble with someone they can report it to the moderator. But I honestly can't see a problem with that happening.
However, if someone wants to talk to someone else, that is why there is the email address option in your profile.
Guess there is two sides to every coin!
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Lana_Marie
Proud Mommy to Bentley Taylor
Born May 12, 2004 9lbs, 3oz
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