fear of stabilising???!!!!
#107670 - 09/22/04 03:53 PM
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daliatree
Reged: 07/10/04
Posts: 1176
Loc: Manhattan, New York
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this may sound weird and I want to make it clear I definetly don't feel this way all time...only a very small amount of the time...and I pray each day to stabilise...BUT
do any of you get secure in your ibs, its predictability, or unpredictability more like, and when you stabilise, do you get a weird sense of fear???
Like I fear its too good to be true. Last night for the first time in months (my ten year long ibs deterioated terribly four months ago from C to D following a tummy bug) I had a normal bowel movement. Normal urge, normal log etc etc I have been working so hard on my diet....I know I deserve this...but I was so shocked by not being C as I have been for the past few weeks that I went and ate a whole load of white bread (which makes me very C and I cannot tolerate) just to bring myself back to C...like I wasn't ready mentally to accept that I might be able to admit soon that I am healthy again. And also the fear that it will return to bite me on the bum and my hopes will be dashed.
It seems to be the same reaction as when I first got a job after being a student..I had spent years in overdraft and after a few pay checks suddenly I saw my bank account had a positive sign infront! The first thing I did was to go and buy my family a present to put myself back in the minus because I knew that that money was the beginning of my savings for a dream round-the-world trip...and I wasn't quite ready to start realising that the dream may come.
I have had a horrible four months....and I am scared to hope that this may be the pot of gold at the end of a dark tunnel.
Am I alone in these sentiments????
With love XXXX
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Feel the fear and do it anyway!
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I don't know if I would do something that I knew would make me worse, but I do understand the idea. I also get very scared everytime I feel good because i am affaried it won't last. It's like ok how long before I am in pain again. Instead oh yes No Pain. I try very hard to talk myself out those moments. I also think it might be a women thing becuse i know my hsband just does not get it. He realy thinks that is crazy. I could be wrong but i don't know to many men who worry like women do.
I hope you feel better soon.
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Heather7476
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Oh yeah, this is a surprisingly common psychological thing, and not that hard to understand once you tease it all out. Not only is IBS very familiar to you, but it may have shown up as a response to some stressor in your life. If it goes away, the stressor may still be there and you have to figure out how to deal with it!
This is something that comes up in the hypnotherapy program. There's some postings about the "mind-armies" in the hypno board: here's an example.
Have you tried the hypno program? It's specially designed to help you overcome this phenomenon.
--AC
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I also could not imagine doing something to make myself worse, but I am in a similar situation......my girlfriend and I have been talking about going on a day long trailride and I really really wanna do it, but everytime I think about it I get a knot in my tummy thinking....what if i get a D attack, what if they take a trail that goes really high in the mountains on the side of a cliff and I panic cause I am afraid of heights....I have all these what ifs holding me back and I am not sure how to get over them.... i am very skeptical about hypno, I dont believe I am the type of person it would work on.....so yes, in a sense I guess I am afraid of being normal...its almost like I need to have these excuses....
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it's not that uncommon for folks to experience feelings like these - they're pretty normal. The hypno program is designed to address exactly these types of feelings and to change your mindset in this area - I'd really urge you to look through the Hypnosis for IBS section of the website and also check out the hypnosis message board. You're not alone in thinking like this, but it's definitely something that can be overcome. 
- H
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Heather is the Administrator of the IBS Message Boards. She is the author of Eating for IBS and The First Year: IBS, and the CEO of Heather's Tummy Care. Join her IBS Newsletter. Meet Heather on Facebook!
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