I feel so hopeless
#212149 - 09/09/05 05:31 PM
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crew
Reged: 06/24/05
Posts: 170
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So, I have been trying really hard to be patient with all of this. I have managed to keep the tears away, and I have been able to supress my frustration. But, its just too much. I am so sick of being C and bloated. I am doing everything I can to get myself better ... but I feel like I have gotten worse! Because I'm C, its nearly impossible to identify my "triggers". Occasionally, I will realize that something is giving me gas or causing major bloat .. but I don't care as much about that as I do about know what is triggering my C!! Everytime I feel the slightest urge to go the bathroom, I run to the toilet and just hope for a normal BM. Doesn't happen. I always end up straining and forcing the tiniest bit out. I'm afraid I'm going to give myself a hernia . I don't know what to do. There is so much stuff to remember .. I don't know the difference between a probiotic, and a prebiotic, and the SFS, and Miralax, and acidopholus (or HOWEVER you spell it!). I feel like I am so scrambled in this. I already have major issues about my body .. so bloating is about the worse thing for me right now. I get SUPER selfconscious and I feel disgusting when my belly gets so bloated. It keeps me from going out .. and in turn, my relationship with my boyfriend is suffereing. I feel like I am keeping him from so many things. Plus, and this may be TMI, but I don't ever want to have sex b/c i am embarrassed of my bloating, or just b/c of the fact that my IBS causes sex to be painful! AAAAAAHHHH! I am 19, and I just want to be a normal teenager ... instead I spend my time crying in the bathroom just wishing I could go like a normal person!
I'm sorry for the long post .. I needed to get this out. I don't have anyone else to talk to about it ... my family just can't understand how miserable IBS really makes you. If there is a C person out there who is stable ... can you give me some advice as far as a routine .. I mean .. what is your exact daily routine as far as supplements and foods. How quickly does Miralax take effect, and how long will I be on the toilet with it (would it be ok to take it, if I have plans to go out?) I don't know .. I just need help. I keep starting the entire diet over from the beginning b/c I get scared that I am not doing it right.
Thanks for listening
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I'm sorry you feel so upset and hopeless, but seriously try to look at the positive side...you still have a lot of options and things to try that could help you! And if it makes you feel better, I started out with my IBS-C feeling bloating and in pain all the freakin time! I could only go to the bathroom like once a week on my own I too wouldn't have sex with my boyfriend(now ex) because I was in pain and felt so uncomfortable. And I couldn't digest many things well, barely any insoluble fiber. BUT...now I'm doing SO much better!! I can eat most things (except still am intolerent to whole wheat) and I'm ok, and I can go to the bathroom everyday, or almost everyday So you know what, that shows that people can improve with their IBS. Just gotta find the right stuff to use, and be patient with it. Everyone's different though, so what might work for some may not work for others.
I think the best thing to do is to start off with a stool softener(Colace or store brand equivilent, but NOT Peri-Colace) and start with a small dose of soluble fiber supplement. Keep in mind that often people will respond well to certain fibers and not so well to others, so if you start one and it gives you attacks, don't give up, you may just need to switch to another. Personally I took Metamucil and it helped me a ton, though I could not tolerate the other brands of fiber, but I think usually it's the opposite. If a stool softener and fiber aren't working and you've been on them for awhile, then I'd say progress on towards Miralax. But try over the counter stuff first. Personally, Miralax gave me bad attacks and I was unable to use it. But most people can tolerate it fine.
-------------------- IBS-C
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sorry to hear about your frustrations. i can relate 100 fold. i'm just curious, do you eat dairy? if so, i would try eliminating dairy from your diet since it is a major trigger of IBS-C.
you should try different fiber supplements, drink tons of water, eat prunes, walnuts, pumpkin seeds, and take magnesium supplements. you should also do a trial run of aloe vera supplements (no more than 2 a week) to get things moving. also go get a deep tissue massage - there are pressure points on the back that stimulate peristalsis in the bowels. i would seriously recommend a daily enema just to train your bowels to get moving. they are completely safe.
hope this helps
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Hi Chelsea, I know how you feel, I'm in the same boat, and have the same problem with the BM's and straining. I often feel rather hopeless too:(. I pray a lot, and just hope for the better. With Miralax,it depends on how much you take and when you take it. With one 17gram dose first thing in the morning will usually generate a BM sometime the next day. You can take up to 4 doses spread out over the day, that should get you going first thing the next morning, and you may have to go a couple times in a row. Hang in there! I hope you get some relief and improve, and feel better. -Bob
-------------------- <img src="http://www.math.mtu.edu/~rwkolkka/BritPicA.jpg">
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Oh my gosh...you sound just like me. I just recently started having IBS symptoms (at least bad enough that I considered it being IBS). I don't have constipation too often, but I do get bloated and gassy a lot. I get very self conscious too. I won't let my boyfriend touch my stomach because it feels so huge to me, and I lose a lot of my sex drive just because I feel fat and/or uncomfortable. Hopefully we can both find some relief. If I were you, I'd try eating oatmeal on a daily basis (this has been keeping me regular for 2 yrs now)and drinking some hot beverages- tea, coffee, whatever.
-------------------- Kim
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Oatmeal is a pretty regular breakfast for me .. although, I don't think i tolerate as well as some ... its more like "BLOATMEAL" for me!
I drink tea .. it just doesn't help much. Maybe I just need to keep trying different tea? Thanks so much for your advice! Its good to remind myself that there are people in the same boat as me
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...if it bloats you up and doesn't agree with you. Are you taking it because it helps you to have BMs? It's hard to choose between increased BMs and bloat!
Maybe consider another breakfast? I don't know what else you could eat, but there have been some threads lately on what people eat for breakfast who have Constipation.
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Heather recommends not taking aloe. See these posts in the Research Library web page and web page I don't know if she means long term use or using it at all.
Is it really safe to take an enema (like fleets) everyday?
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aloe is fine if taken in moderation, or just to give your system a little kick in the ass. my ex girfriends grandfather has been taking it for years and he is perfectly fine and 95 years old.
regular enemas with water are fine. i wouldnt do fleet enemas frequently since the chemicals in there can disrupt the balance of electrolytes and cause dehydration.
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I'm not IBS-C, but perhaps I can help with a few of your more general questions.
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There is so much stuff to remember .. I don't know the difference between a probiotic, and a prebiotic, and the SFS, and Miralax, and acidopholus (or HOWEVER you spell it!).
A probiotic is good bacteria. It's sort of the opposite of an antibiotic because it adds bacteria in, rather than killing them off. Some people think IBS is partly caused or made worse by too few good bacteria and/or too many bad bacteria. If you take a probiotic, you're giving your body good bacteria which may help you digest your food.
A prebiotic is a substance that helps feed the good bacteria. So it's something you might take before you take the probiotic, so the bacteria have a kind of food they like and are more likely to take up residence in your gut.
An SFS is a Soluble Fiber Supplement. As Heather explains it, Soluble Fiber is good for IBS because it helps normalize the colon spasms (that's a really simplified version). It's hard to eat enough Soluble Fiber to make a difference to an IBS colon, so she strongly recommends taking a Soluble Fiber Supplement to get enough Soluble Fiber to calm down your gut.
Miralax is a laxative. I think that in the US it's only available by prescription. A lot of people believe it's safe to use everyday because it works by drawing water into your gut to make it easier to have a BM. That makes it gentler than laxatives that force your colon to move. I don't have an opinion on Miralax, since I've never had to use a laxative, but I know some people swear by it so you might discuss it with your doctor.
Acidopholus is one kind of probiotic. It's a particular kind of good bacteria that a lot of people think is particularly important for your gut. It's also the kind found in yogurt, if I remember correctly, so it's one you can get "naturally". (I don't think our bodies care whether we get our bacteria naturally from soy yogurt or unnaturally from a pill.)
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I keep starting the entire diet over from the beginning b/c I get scared that I am not doing it right.
If that means you keep going back to eating just Soluble Fiber foods, that seems to be a really bad idea for people who are C. If you're C, you need Insoluble Fiber to make you go. The trick is to eat Insoluble Fiber with enough Soluble Fiber to cushion it.
You might consider keeping track of what you're eating for a couple of days and posting it on this Board. People here are very good about taking a look at information like that and making suggestions that might help.
If you didn't see it, Heather had a series of FAQs about Constipation in a couple of recent newsletters. You can look at old newsletters here. Maybe some of those suggestions would help.
For the bloating, people recommend fennel tea and Gas-X, so you might try those.
I'm sorry you're having such a terrible time. I hope this helps.
-------------------- [Research tells us fourteen out of any ten individuals likes chocolate. - Sandra Boynton]
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Sidewalker
#212264 - 09/10/05 03:43 PM
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Sand
Reged: 12/13/04
Posts: 4490
Loc: West Orange, NJ (IBS-D)
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Dairy is one of Heather's 4 trigger foods and is a trigger for all forms of IBS, not just IBS-C. Prunes, walnuts, and pumpkin seeds are all IF and should be eaten carefully with an SF base.
This Board is support for people who are using Heather's guidelines to help their IBS. When you make suggestions that are way out of line with Heather's approach, would you please make it clear you're doing so? That way new people who are looking for help following Heather's diet will not be confused by hearing advice that runs totally contrary to what Heather recommends.
Thanks.
-------------------- [Research tells us fourteen out of any ten individuals likes chocolate. - Sandra Boynton]
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-------------------- [Research tells us fourteen out of any ten individuals likes chocolate. - Sandra Boynton]
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yep - for a good portion of his life
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but once in a while can be OK as long as it's a gentle one!
-------------------- Keep on keepin' on...
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Thanks so much for clearing those up! That will be a huge help I'm sure!
The main reason I keep starting my diet over, is usually because .. after a while of seeing no changes, I just decide that I'm doing something wrong. I am scared to try a lot of different things b/c .. since I am so C .. it will be nearly impossible for me to know what IF's I am handling well, and what IF's I should avoid. Is it possible for an IF to constipate me more .. or is it more along the lines of gas,bloating, and cramps that people speak of. Because, I know there are many who say "I dont tolerate tomatoes" or "Whole grains are impossible for me". In what way do you mean? Diarrhea, MORE constipation, gas, bloating??? To be honest .. I don't care if something is going to cause me D. I would be thrilled! I don't ever have pain with my IBS so nothing ever causes me cramping or spasms. I keep wondering if maybe fruits like grapes and oranges (that normally cause some folks D) might be a good thing for me? But anyway .. my day to day usually goes like this
Breakfast (One of these) 8am
-Oatmeal with rice milk and strawberries W/ SFS
-Jamba Juice protein smoothie w/ SFS (bananas, strawberries, soymilk, and soy protein ... i emailed the company and this is dairy and HFCS free)
-Plain bagel with jelly (seedless, and HFCS free)
-Cream of Rice w/ brown sugar and SFS
.. then usually about 2 hours later I have a piece of fruit (with the peel) apple, mango, nectarine, or banana
Lunch 12:00
-Leftovers from the night before
-Sandwhich on white bread with deli turkey and safe mayo (Hellmans 'Just 2 good'
-Pasta with garlic salt and chicken/shrimp
2:30
-Pretzels
-carrots in RF peanut butter
-oatmeal
-fruit
-dry safe cereal
4:00
-same as above
Dinner 7 or 8 pm
-This is always something from the IBS recipe exchange
Looking over these .. i realize that i do need more IF. But, like I said .. I am too scared to begin eating something that might be making me worse, and I won't even know. Plus .. I fill up with so much gas, that it almost seems like THAT makes me more C too. When re-introducing IF .. how slow exactly are we supposed to do it? hah. I mean .. is it like, small amounts in every meal .. orr, just IF in one meal a day .. and then two meals a day ... and then so on? Also .. on some of the fruits that you guys avoid, is this due to diarrhea? Or something else? Because I think plums and other fruits might be helpful for me.
Anyway .. Thanks for EVERYONE'S help! This board is so great about jumping in and supporting everyone. I really appreciate it .. I'm feeling pretty low right now about all of this .. but hopefully I will eventually get on the right track, and find my groove.
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Quote:
.. then usually about 2 hours later I have a piece of fruit (with the peel) apple, mango, nectarine, or banana
I don't think you are supposed to eat the peeling of fruit! Someone else can probably clalify!
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...because it gives me D. It's so funny when I hear someone has a name for something that I have a name for...!
~nelly~
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No .. eating the peel is fine, for some people .. especially when they are IBS-C. Its just Insoluble Fiber .. although, it should be eaten after some SF first.
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I think many of these suggestions, are actually VERY big no-no's. Heather has specifically warned us about enemas and aloe. Also, figs and seeds are IF ... although they probably are healthy and may improve regulation .. they need to follow some SF. I have eliminated dairy from my diet ... along with all of the other triggers. My problem is figuring out what my Insoluble Fiber triggers are ... trigger meaning, making my C worse.
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I found it in the healthfood section in Krogers. It's the only oat meal I found that I can eat without a reaction. It's embarressing to buy it but I just pretend it's for my kids.
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It does look like you're not getting a lot of IF, as you've already figured out. The other thing it looks to me like you're low on is fat, unless you're getting a fair amount of it at dinner. As far as how to know what foods bother you, for me it's easy - it gives me D or at least a grumbly tummy. I don't know what the equivalent of that would be for you if you're still pretty much always constipated.
I can't really talk about what you're going through from personal experience becaue I'm solidly IBS-D, but based on what I've read on this Board from people who are IBS-C, I can tell you what I believe I'd do if I were C: I'd treat IF as if it was a medicine. My base diet would be all SF. Then, I'd add just a little bit of IF (1/4 apple with peel, one nectarine, one whole wheat cracker, one slice of Zucchini Bread, 4 strawberries in a smoothie, 1/2 orange, 1 plum, 1/3 prune, 1/4 cup green beans, whatever I picked to start with). I'd eat that same little bit every day for 3 days. Then I'd add another little bit (a different little bit) and eat those two little bits every day for 3 days. Then another, then another. I'd make sure that I was getting some fat, too, even if I had to add it in the same regimented fashion. This approach would be incredibly boring and a serious pain in the neck to maintain, but it would reassure me that I was getting my IF (and fat) and increasing it gradually.
At the same time I was doing this, I'd be taking an SFS, starting at a low dose and increasing it gradually; drinking lots of fennel tea (oh, yuck) for the gas and bloating; and drinking lots and lots of fluid.
And I'd set a time limit, like, I'll do this faithfully for 2 months or 3 months or 6 months, and if I'm not doing better by then, I'll figure this isn't working.
It really seems to me that for people who are IBS-C, following Heather's diet has to be an act of faith at the beginning. You have to keep eating SF, adding in IF (and fat), and taking your SFS without really seeing improvement for a while. It was different for me: I started Heather's diet, felt better immediately, and the longer I was on the diet and the more SFS I took, the better I felt. At this point, if I follow Heather's diet, I'm stable.
I hope this helps at least a little and even more I hope you do find your groove soon.
BTW, I agree with you that eating the peels on your fruit is a good idea. Except for the banana - that peel I'd skip.
-------------------- [Research tells us fourteen out of any ten individuals likes chocolate. - Sandra Boynton]
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I just cook mine in plain water with quite a lot of raw cane sugar. It works wonders for me. The cooking it doesn't really take extra time, because I don't use milk of any kind, so I can just let it boil while I take care of other things like packing my lunch.
-------------------- IBS-C after amoebic dysentria. Symptoms mostly after eating too much. Wanting to (re)gain weight.
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Oh no, I am cooking it! Yuck, do people eat it uncooked??? I cook it in rice milk instead of water .. it adds a little bit of sweetness and makes it a little more creamier. MmMMmmm
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Haha, maybe I will try that! But, I'm a 19yr old who looks like a 12yr old, so I doubt I would have to make any excuses about my elmo oatmeal!!
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You totally need to increase your IF! So long as you're getting SF every time you eat IF, I honestly wouldn't worry about increasing your crampiness. Bloating is trickier, but certainly getting more regular would help!
My personal C commandments - well, suggestions, since everyone is different:
1. IF + SF. Every meal and snack needs both. Don't be too scared of raw fruits and veggies and whole grains! 2. Exercise. Every day if possible. Heather suggests higher intensity exercise if low-intensity stuff doesn't get you going. 3. Liquids. Drink 'em down, and drink 'em constantly. As is true for all IBS-ers, avoid straws, carbonated drinks, and cold drinks and try to get loads of peppermint and fennel teas. 4. Patience. IBS-C isn't conquered in a day or a month. Just keep increasing your IF and stay away from the big triggers of high fat, dairy, coffee, and red meat.
I went the all-SF, all-the-time route too when I started on Heather's diet. It's a bit scary to increase those fruits and veggies, but honestly, enough SF will "cushion" them enough to prevent cramping.
--AC
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Cramping isnt even a worry of mine, as it rarely EVER happens. Its just the gas and bloating What would you say a safe SF to IF ratio would be? Like earlier .. i wanted a pear .. so i was going to have a piece of sliced french bread first .. but i was afraid that wouldn't be enough .. so i had 1.5 slices .. but then was full from the bread and didn't even want the pear. haha. Ya catch my drift? How do you normally balance the two?
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I tried running instead of walking and my knees gave out on me. But, the walking isn't cutting it for the BMs.
Any suggestions on high intensity exercises that aren't hard on the knees?
-------------------- ~ Beth
Constipation, pain prodominent,cramps, spasms and bloat!
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Hi Chelsea, The ratio should be 1.0 or smaller for C. That was what stable Cer's reported a while back. -Bob
-------------------- <img src="http://www.math.mtu.edu/~rwkolkka/BritPicA.jpg">
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1.0 of SF or IF ... and in comparison to how much of the other?
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Hey, I am so glad you posted specifics. I am trying to start the diet over again. I am IBS-D. And I have both of Heather's book Eating for IBS, and The First Year.. And I get so overwhelmed by it all. I have read both of them and I am still having probs with balancing and planning my meals. Esp. since i dont have a health store nearby. I have to shop at a basic supermarket. So I buy store bought bread like french and sourdough breads any specific brands anyone uses? And I have bought a lot of pasta but besides meat what do you use as a sauce or something to liven the pasta up.. just add salt doesnt work for me. Also, same thing with rice.. i used to love eating rice with tons of butter.. any good substitutes for that?
Anyone that is IBS-D feel free to post some of things you eat on a daily basis.. I would greatly appreciate it.
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Chelsea, 1.0 is the ratio of grams of SF to grams of IF, in other words you eat equal amounts of SF and IF. But for C you should try to get more IF though. -Bob
-------------------- <img src="http://www.math.mtu.edu/~rwkolkka/BritPicA.jpg">
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Quote:
I tried running instead of walking and my knees gave out on me. But, the walking isn't cutting it for the BMs.
Any suggestions on high intensity exercises that aren't hard on the knees?
Have you tried walking really fast? Biking? Weight lifting? Pretty much anything that will get you sweaty might tip you over the edge. (The fitness forum might have some more ideas for you, too.)
--AC
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Quote:
Cramping isnt even a worry of mine, as it rarely EVER happens. Its just the gas and bloating What would you say a safe SF to IF ratio would be?
I think you have to experiment on your own. I think gas and bloating have more to do with getting enough fluids (particularly our friends peppermint & fennel tea) than IF, at least in my case. Try a small slice of bread followed by a pear (or half a pear) and see how that works. If the pear is peeled, you might not even need any additional SF.
The only way I found my own personal tolerances was to keep cranking up the IF gradually but steadily. Making sure it's in every meal continues to help me!
--AC
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Oh, Dear. I'm so sorry for what you're going through; tough enough being 19 without this to cope with! Regarding BANANAS! I use these to help stop my D! Seizes me up like a cork! I just wonder if that could be one of your culprits! If I had one every day, even being a D, I'm sure I'd be a C in no time!
Just a suggestion from a new gal, but ditch the bananas and see what happens.
Good luck and believe me, I know how confusing all this is; I've lurked for a while and tried to make some sense of it all, but even now those short forms people rattle off I still have to look up!
We'll get thru this, no worries. But bananas?! Ditch 'em! I'm a D and they constipate me!
Good luck...
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Can you, yourself, eat the fruits with tougher skins, like apples or pears, unpeeled?
Do you eat an acutal SF Food before the IF....or is taking an SFS supplement beforehand safe enough.
Thanks for any help.
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Re: Bananas
#213287 - 09/14/05 12:20 PM
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Snorkie
Reged: 02/15/05
Posts: 1999
Loc: Northern Illinois, USA
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Bananas constipate you? Huh. Interesting. They either do nothing to me OR they make me go.
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I thought this was a myth.
Do other C people refrain from eating bananas?
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...Lynn said it. I have no idea. What are you Snorkie, D or C?
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I started out as a D. I'm pretty stable now, but I'm an A with a little more D than C.
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but remember, there can be 30 eating the same banana's...at the same time...same day of the week...and have 30 different reactions to them.
Oh the joys of IBS....I am just glad God gave me a sense of humor!
-------------------- Have a blessed day!...Rachel
stable and sooooooo thankful!
I have IBS but it doesn't have me!
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Quote:
Can you, yourself, eat the fruits with tougher skins, like apples or pears, unpeeled?
Do you eat an acutal SF Food before the IF....or is taking an SFS supplement beforehand safe enough.
Thanks for any help.
Yes, I do eat unpeeled fruit, particularly when I feel myself heading towards C. I'll have it at the end of a meal that has SF. I don't usually eat fruit all by its lonesome.
If you're eating a lot of little meals, just have smaller portions of everything: a half or quarter sandwich plus a small chunk of fruit. Yeah, you might end up throwing out some food, but better to throw it out than to eat it and feel sick!
--AC
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Quote:
Yes, I do eat unpeeled fruit, particularly when I feel myself heading towards C. I'll have it at the end of a meal that has SF. I don't usually eat fruit all by its lonesome
So, the unpeeled fruits do include the harder skinned fruits, like apples and pears...raw too?
And you do eat an SF food in the meal, not just rely on your Acacia? Or do you take Acacia before the meal and eat the SF in the meal?
If I ate about 3/4 cup of cereal, do you think that is enough SF for an unpeeled plum, apple, nectarine?
What if I have a veggie in the meal? Can I still have a fruit or is that going overboard?
Sorry so many questions.
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Quote:
So, the unpeeled fruits do include the harder skinned fruits, like apples and pears...raw too?
Oh, I love apples, and I eat a raw one a day (peel and all) when I can get local ones in the fall. I don't eat so many pears, but the other fruits I eat (peaches, nectarines, berries) I rarely peel or cook. But they're never more than 1/3 or 1/4 of my meal.
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And you do eat an SF food in the meal, not just rely on your Acacia? Or do you take Acacia before the meal and eat the SF in the meal?
Yes, I have SF in every meal I eat, even if I'm taking one of my acacia doses at the same time. I only take acacia twice a day, though, so I have several meals/snacks without it. If I wasn't so lazy, I'd have acacia with every meal, though!
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If I ate about 3/4 cup of cereal, do you think that is enough SF for an unpeeled plum, apple, nectarine?
What if I have a veggie in the meal? Can I still have a fruit or is that going overboard?
Everyone is different. You're not going to know what works for you until you try it out yourself. You can always start out with smaller amounts of fruit and/or chop and/or cook it, and then ramp up from there.
But personally, I do sometimes have fruits and vegetables at the same meal. One of 'em is going to be cooked or chopped or put in a smoothie, though! And I'm still a little wary about salads, although there are enough people here eating them that I'm going to challenge myself the next time I see a yummy one.
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