you said.. "how can he ever forgive me?" (or something to that effect, I read it a few minutes ago).. the real question is how can you EVER forgive him?
You told someone close to him problems that he may very well have, and it wasn't out of hate.. it was so that you could help him. You thought.. well he may not listen to me, but maybe he'll listen to his mom...
On the contrary, he's made rude, disgusting comments, gone out drinking, flirted with his little girl right in front of your face, looked at kiddie porn, lied, etc for who knows how long. I agree that he's manipulating you into feeling bad- and I think he probably has for awhile (i.e. getting you to let him look at porn, getting you to allow him to skip every family function so that you're the one always alone) etc..
It sounds like he may be a fabulous manipulator. The reason he can't look you in the eye isn't because you told on him.. its because he is beginning to realize what an a-hole he's been to you, and just how harsh he really was. He's not looking you in the eye because he wants to keep thinking that what he's doing is right, and if he looked at you.. maybe he'd realize that he did it the wrong way.
It shouldn't be you that needs to prove to him that you're worthy of him and deserve another shot.. he needs to prove that to you. I know.. I sound harsh, but I'm really upset over all this crap with him, and the fact that he can still easily make you feel like crap and as though its all your fault- when he is clearly the one that did the wrong thing.
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I agree with EVERYTHING that Blondie mentioned...
