Irritable Bowel Syndrome Message Boards

Oh, I have SOOOOOO been there!

Girl, let them go. It won't serve you well to mourn the loss. Let them go. It's in the past; it's over with.

This has happened to me SOOOOO many times. The last girlfriend I had is in California; when she told me she loved me, I was determined to hold onto her no matter what. When I lived in California, we worked together, but when she changed jobs, I was miserable without her, so I got a job at her new office to be close to her. When we decided to move away from California, she was the only thing that concerned me; I did not want to lose her. She assured me that could never happen between us, but she lied.

I e-mailed her CONSTANTLY, and she e-mailed me back, but not as often. As time passed, I heard less and less from her. I called her, and e-mailed her even more until I realized she didn't have the time for me anymore. I didn't want to force myself on her, so I stopped e-mailing too.

I went through an awful mourning period, like a death in the family. Barbie was SOOOOO incredibly supportive and gave me some very wise advice that I'm gonna pass on to you: for now -- just for now -- put your friends up on the shelf. You can always take them down at any time IF YOU WANT, but just put them up there and keep them there. That's what I did with my friend; she became known as The Shelf Lady.

Last Christmas, I was shocked to receive a phone call from The Shelf Lady. A lot of time had passed, and I had finally gotten over her; it was a good thing. But when she called, I was dumbfounded. For awhile, I took The Shelf Lady down off that shelf. We talked for over two hours, and, while it was nice hearing about the old gang in
California, the feelings I had for her had passed; it was over.

I haven't heard from The Shelf Lady since. She's no longer on that shelf; she's gone.

People come into our lives and leave just as quickly; it's something I've always had a problem with. But putting those we love up on The Shelf worked for me because I knew I still had them up there and could take them down at any time IF I CHOSE. Use The Shelf.

BTW, I had a wonderful wedding 39 years ago, but do you know that now I couldn't name ONE of our friends who attended?!

You're a very personable gal who will find new friends. I lost The Shelf Lady, but look what I found: Barbie!

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<img src="http://home.comcast.net/~letsrow/smily3481.gif">Bevvy

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