Hey Girlfriend!
Dang, it's good to see you back!
The flu, eh? You're right to wash your hands! And avoid any and all touching of anything ANYWHERE! Howard Hughes was right! No kidding, I keep a bottle of hand sanitizer in my purse and use it throughout the day. I grab ahold of doors with my shirtsleeve and wipe the handle of the grocery cart with sanitizer wipes before I use it. When I shake someone's hand, I politely excuse myself to go to the bathroom so I can wash it afterwards. Where are the tissues?!
Hey, it works! I haven't had the flu in a hundred years.
Your friend is like my friend, Virginia, who won't even bother asking me how I'm doing, even though she knows I've been on medication for two weeks for my diverticulitis. Do you think she could just say, "are you feeling better?" OR "I'm sorry you're sick"? NOOOOOOOOOOO! It's like avoidance = getting rid of the issue altogether. Your friend calls you a hypochondriac so she doesn't have to deal with your illness. Nice.
You're not a hypochondriac, you're someone with IBS who's had ENOUGH! 
Don't be such a stranger, ya heah?!
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<img src="http://home.comcast.net/~letsrow/smily3481.gif">Bevvy
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Howard Hughes Was Right!
