I apologize for making two posts, but both I felt were important, because I am not comfortable speaking with anybody, friends, family, other than my therapist, and I only get so much time with him a week, and I only began recently.
Refresh. I am 22, male, in college.
Have any of you ever had this happen?
I got this controlling roomate, I choose to live with.
We got some things in common, the gym and hockey being two of them.
He has a gf.
I basically am with him all the time.
He at least has a break with his gf.
It stinks.
I notice when I go away from for a few days, I feel better, my head is clearer, and I want to hang out with him.
Then, within a few days of going back to the same old same old, the same stuff returns.
I lose interest in things I used to like.
I get stressed out.
I can't think for myself.
We went to Montreal over break.
I hated it.
I couldn't get into the game.
I was there but everything felt like a blah.
My biggest porblems are, I can't get interested in things I used to, I feel I can't speak up and my opinion, but most of the time, I don't know what my opinion is.
I can't think for myself, everything is a blah, I don't what I want, what I am doing, if I am doing it because I like it, he likes it, or we both do.
I'm stressed and not enjoying anything.
Funny thing is when I get a break for him or get my own life, things get better.
So I wanted to know, what do you think is going on, and what I can do so I am me again.
It honsetly feels like someone has "hacked" into my brain.
I feel brainwashed and controlled.
I don't feel in the mood to even watch hockey or hang out with others.
Yet this inversely varies.
The longer I have been with him, the greater this phneomuea is, the shorter, the better it is.
Take Sunday for example.
I'm going to the gym with him. On the bus over, I bring up I like the VW Jetta. We get into a discussion about cars.
He is so the Abercrombie and Fitch poster boy.
He cares all about style, muscles, having top of the line clothes to show off.
We get into an debate about cars.
I tell him I place more value on reliability.
He starts in about how looks are mor eimportant.
Big deal right?
Well yeh, because you see ever since I became with friends with him last spring, I've been too scared to be speak up to him for fear he won't be friends with me.
Well this time, after months of hating everything and thinking it's because I'm miserable, I came to the realization it's not me, I hate everything because I am tired of walking on egg shells and not being able to be myself.
So instead of doing the usually, saying you're right I agree with you, I stand by my opinion.
I do not cuss or get personal at all like I have done on here. I simply respectfully disagree.
Well I knew what was coming.
He didn't like it.
He kept going at with me.
Then we get upstairs to lift.
He is still angry, and stomps out saying he is so flustered he is going to go run.
He comes back in five minutes, we workout, he doesn't talk me.
Once the workout is over, he then talks to me.
I was going to go watch the NCAA game, he was going to run.
It was halftime, and he nicely talks with me, asks me to get him a sandwich while he runs.
I decide I would do him a favor since it was the break.
I then watch the game, I see my old school winning.
He comes downstairs.
Then he starts making fun of my old school.
I don't care, I like banter back and fourth, it's fun, as long as it's not personal.
I jokingly make comments about his old school, he gets angry.
His face gets angry and then he starts making personal comments to me.
I make some back to him, then he starts hitting me.
He has done this before to me in the gym, and not wanting to make a scene, I ignore it.
I know if I don't ingore it, he will go on and on.
He is an only child, and can not handle ANY crtisisms and can not take any negativivity back to him, so I knew he'd get like this.
I decide, I am not taking his BS any longer.
I hit him back, he keeps hitting me, I hit him, and then it gets harder.
Then, he leaves, doesn't even say thanks.
We both live together, we choose to.
BIG MISTAKE.
He comes that night, Sunday, doesn't talk.
On MOnday, he calls, asks to go to the gym.
I didn't want to, but I did because I wanted a spot for chest and the time was conveinent.
I was tired of taking it from him, so when I meet him there, I thought it was important to tell him not to get phsyical like that in public or anywhere again.
In the past, when I've told him not to, his response always has been that I run my mouth, I piss him off, it's my fault.
Now, I know on here I would run my mouth, but with this kid, hardly.
I hardly ever disagree with him, because I know when I do, he'll make a big stink like a spoiled, single, only child.
I don't insult or cuss, I simply don't agree with him, and he can't that.
He does not have many friends, he has a girlfriend who he is obsessed with, he sleeps with everynight, text messages 100 times a day.
His friends are all back home, and a year younger than him, or they are girls.
Why?
Because he is a control freak who won't hang out unless he is in charge.
Let me give you a good example.
A month ago, he had a disagreement with his girlfriend, during which she got dressed and tried to leave the premise.
On Tuesday, we both in the fall signed a contract with a real estate firm to help us find an apartment.
The fee was 300 dollars, but if we found one without their services, we would get out money back.
I got notice today we weren't getting our money back.
I likely will take them to court, but I asked him if he was going to pay his half should we not get anything in return.
He avoided the question, then said he shouldn;t.
I did pressure or put him on the spot to sign, and he did sign his name to the contract, but he likes to pressure and push others which gives him no position to complain.
He could have said no, but he didn't, so he should pay, it was his choice.
He continued to say no.
I told him if he doesn't pay, I will not give him money for the gas bill, which is under his account.
Since then, he has locked himself into his room with his girlfriend, not called me, not asked to go the gym, not talked to me.
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IBS-C and Bloating
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Abusive Relationship? (Long)
