Irritable Bowel Syndrome Message Boards | Re: I need help my 5 year old wont play by herself

my daughter has ALWAYS been like this...always needs to be by my side...for a little history, i had her at 19, left her abusive father before she was born, he wasn't around for about 2 years, then suddenly wanted 50% custody. i'd lived with my mom rent free, and i'd go work for a family to watch their child, with kapiolani. at 3 i got a job as a trainer, and worked longer hours, she adjusted to the schedual, and was ok. at 3 1/2 my ex sorta forced his way to live with us, we soon moved from a studio to a 2 bedroom, he was really horrbile to me and not that good with her, so he left within a few months...he started stalking me, and i had to get a restraining order. we moved again to a smaller apartment, closer to my work, and mike, months later...in june, 9 months after moving again, we moved with mike to his appartment, the following month, we moved to a 3 bedroom because at the time we had a roommate...so now we are here, but probalby will move again in a few month, to a cheaper apartment, because i wont be working...so thats the story..she's obvously been with me through out it all..and i think part she jsut might be afraid i'd leave her, though i never have, or would...but i can't say it's been really stable...as far as living situations go.

but since she's been a baby she's been like LOOK AT ME!!! and pretty high maintanance, so i'm guessing alot has to do with her personality.

Mikes good with her most of the time, but sometimes he doens't understand that getting mad, and staying mad at her all day is not right...i get mad with her...send her to her room...and i actually ususally let her decided when to come out (unless it's really bad..this is if she throws a tantrum) then she's settled down, gotten her anger out, and will come back and talk to me about whatever went wrong.

but when it comes to playing, she'll only want to play WITH people. I was more interverted, i could hangout by myself, but was forced to too...she's been around me and grownups so much more than kids...(except in prechool and kindergarden) taht she's actually really mature for 5. her mind understands alot more than alot of 5 year olds would understand.

but its like a punishment when i tell her to go play, and it kills me, becuase for one, i'm like what i would do for someone to say, "go play" of coruse kids don't get that...but for another reason, i use to play by myself all the time, i told her that too, she said "well thats because grandma had alot of work, and you don't" i was like YOU little SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.....in my head..but geeze its like i give her too much attention....where do you find a happy medium?!?!??!

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