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Michele
      01/11/06 05:50 AM
poochibelly

Reged: 04/27/05
Posts: 1614


The first baby I lost should be 21 years old right now and in my heart of hearts I think he was a boy though I will never know for sure. Knowing if the baby was a boy or girl for me would have made it easier to lay him to rest...if that makes any sense.

It was a long time before I was able to look at pregnant mommies and not be jealous...here these women were glowing and so happy to have a life within them and I was sending daggers at them because I was hurting so much.

To this day I remember the first mommy that I could look at and rejoice with her that she was pregnant. We had already adopted my daughter, she was 2 years old as a matter of fact and suddenly I was jealous no more.

I still long for another baby...my son was three years old when we adopted him so I had only one.

I share all of this with you to say that you are totally entitled to be angry...sad...totally PO'ed and such. Don't come down on yourself for feeling what may seem like irrational feelings because I assure you they are totally rational.

Walk through those feelings...the healing will come. Healing doesn't bring our babies back...I have lost at least three but we get by.

Harley is a great start....I am still waiting for a picture of him in his jacket .

I so wish I could come see you and just hug you or sit in the middle of the floor and cry with you. I cry real good and you know I understand.

There are no words...so I am not sure why I just shared all of this but my prayer is that something I said blesses you.



--------------------
Have a blessed day!...Rachel
stable and sooooooo thankful!
I have IBS but it doesn't have me!


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Entire thread
* Dreading dr's appt tomorrow
michele
01/10/06 08:49 AM
* Michele
poochibelly
01/11/06 05:50 AM
* Re: Dreading dr's appt tomorrow
EvilCats
01/10/06 09:43 PM
* hugs, thoughts, prayers
ChristineM
01/10/06 08:35 PM
* Aw, Michele!
Stephie
01/10/06 04:18 PM
* Re: Dreading dr's appt tomorrow
mindyj
01/10/06 03:10 PM
* Re: Update: Healthy baby girls
michele
01/11/06 09:56 AM
* Sending you hugs and support
melitami
01/11/06 12:55 PM
* Michele....I have no words of wisdom
Augie
01/11/06 12:39 PM
* Michelle that's nonsense!
Linz
01/11/06 10:39 AM
* Re: Michelle that's nonsense!
michele
01/11/06 11:49 AM
* Oh okay!
Linz
01/12/06 05:11 AM
* Re: Update: Healthy baby girls
bamagirl
01/11/06 10:15 AM
* Re: Update: Healthy baby girls
michele
01/11/06 10:18 AM
* Michele...
epa_ginger
01/11/06 11:43 AM
* Re: Michele...
michele
01/11/06 12:15 PM
* Re: Update: Healthy baby girls
Snow for Sarala
01/11/06 10:30 AM
* Michele
Tissy
01/11/06 10:02 AM
* Sending mega hugs, Michele! -nt-
barbie
01/10/06 03:00 PM
* Re: Dreading dr's appt tomorrow
BL
01/10/06 02:18 PM
* Re: Dreading dr's appt tomorrow
lalala
01/10/06 12:44 PM
* Re: Dreading dr's appt tomorrow
michele
01/10/06 02:06 PM
* michele, on grief...
jaime g
01/10/06 12:33 PM
* Re: michele, on grief...
michele
01/10/06 02:07 PM
* Here. here Jaime! - nt
Linz
01/10/06 01:34 PM
* Re: Dreading dr's appt tomorrow
Dr. Spice Yamin
01/10/06 11:46 AM
* *big hugs*
atomic rose
01/10/06 11:36 AM
* Re: Thanks girls!
michele
01/10/06 02:09 PM
* Re:((HUGS)), praying for ya, -nt-
Kiwii
01/10/06 11:20 AM
* Hugs & Prayers, Michele--n.t.
Wind
01/10/06 10:57 AM
* Re: Dreading dr's appt tomorrow
RobinR
01/10/06 10:47 AM
* HUGE hugs!!! Many prayers!!! Much love.... -nt-
bamagirl
01/10/06 10:33 AM
* Re: Dreading dr's appt tomorrow
Angela E.
01/10/06 10:28 AM
* Hugs....Michele. There are no words are there?~nt~
poochibelly
01/10/06 10:26 AM
* Michele
Nelly
01/10/06 09:57 AM
* Re: Michele
michele
01/10/06 10:11 AM
* {{{{MORE HUGS!}}}}
Nelly
01/10/06 10:22 AM
* Re: Dreading dr's appt tomorrow
LittleLamb
01/10/06 09:47 AM
* Re: Dreading dr's appt tomorrow
michele
01/10/06 10:08 AM
* BIG Hugs
epa_ginger
01/10/06 09:41 AM
* Re: BIG Hugs
michele
01/10/06 09:47 AM
* Re: Dreading dr's appt tomorrow
Linz
01/10/06 09:40 AM
* Re: Dreading dr's appt tomorrow
michele
01/10/06 09:53 AM
* Michele....
Linz
01/10/06 10:56 AM
* ((((((((((((((((hugs mich)))))))))))))))
Lyndsey
01/10/06 09:01 AM
* Re: ((((((((((((((((hugs mich)))))))))))))))
michele
01/10/06 09:53 AM

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