Reged: 02/02/03
Posts: 909
Loc: Brisbane, Australia
I just don't know how to get through this next week or so without going nuts.
One minute I'm really positive and sure that this transfer has worked and the next minute I'm down in the dumps and sure it hasn't. A couple of days ago I spent two hours crying because I thought I had missed taking some of the HRT tablets and that because of that I had ruined my chances. then I realised that I was looking at the arrows on the sheet of pills backwards. (Dumb I know!)
I really have no feeling either way but am absoultely terrified of dealing with a negative outcome. Last time I only got 10 days post transfer before we found out it hadn't worked. 10 days will fall this saturday and so in one way I'm dreading the weekend and am so scared of what it might bring. On the other hand I want the time to pass so that the agonising waiting and wondering will be over.
I really, really want it to work. Last time I was a little less worried. I wanted it to work but knew that if it didn't I had two frozen embryos up my sleeve. Now I don't so I'm desperate for success otherwise I know I'll have to go through the whole egg pick up operation etc again.
People keep telling me I'm strong and I can do it but that makes me feel as if it's not OK for be to get down over it all.
Also, something that's really weighing on my mind... My Sister and I had a psychic reading at a market a few weeks back just for a laugh. Now I really regret that we did. She told me that she didn't see a pregnancy until the end of 2004. This really depressed me and I want to believe it's rubbish but then when I went to have the transfer last Wednesday I got my wallet out to put our parking pass away and the psychic's business card flew out on my lap as if to say "What are you doing here? I told you what will happen" So then I was really bummed.
Please someone tell me they have had psychic readings that were wrong.
Sorry to bring you all down but I must say it's great to have somewhere to get all this off my chest.
Kerrie
-------------------- What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
Posts
So up and down with this IVF cycle
