Met my friend for dinner today, her treat to cheer me up after my family troubles.
After dinner we went for a drink, started to chat and she relieved me of my duties of being her bridesmaid for her wedding in October. She asked me and two other girls in February 2003 and today she said that she didn't think it was fair to me to ask me to be her bridesmaid when I have so much going on ....like my family problems and my IBS. She didn't want to put pressure on me with all this going on and she didn't want to get mad with me if my tummy wasn't well when I had a fitting etc or I had family stuff going on. I mean there are three bridesmaids, how onerous a task was it going to be.
I got really upset and cried in the pub, I felt like she was saying that I was disabled or inadequate and it was horrible.
I told her that I have been happier and more together in the last three months as I can ever remember, I really felt like she was telling me that I was a mess and all over the shop. I was really mad at her for using my weakest spots as the reasons, felt like she was kicking me when I was down. This is normal for me and just because she doesn't have my problems she doesn't understand this.
Anyway, she said she'd feel stressed feeling that she was making me stressed....are you following? Anyway I left it that it was going to stress her to have me as bridesmaid I would step down, so we agreed I would do that.
I am so hurt, I have made strides in controlling my IBS and really try not to let family issues (that have been with me 15years) affect my life and to have that thrown back at me was just awful.
I don't know how I am going to face going to her wedding now, anytime she looks at me I am going to see pity in her eyes.
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I got fired as bridesmaid!
