Forgive me for whining... I just need to b*tch, and Adam's gotta be tired of hearing about some of this stuff by now.
I feel miserable. I'm not even remotely stable right now. I'm not doing ANYTHING different from what I was doing a few months ago, so I have NO idea why I'm suddenly back to having D every morning, and then spending the rest of the day so nauseated that I can hardly do anything. On top of that, I'm ALWAYS exhausted and achy and my sinuses are driving me crazy. I'm not sick; I've been like this for weeks, never any worse, but never any better, either.
I had my first-ever *conscious* PTSD-related incident a couple days ago. Something I was watching on TV triggered me - I've never recognized those triggers before, so I guess I should be glad that I did, so I can avoid it in the future, but in the meantime, I haven't slept well since, because of the nightmares.
And money... ugh, nevermind, I don't even want to go there.
I've never felt so isolated and alone in my life.
I've been trying to reply to posts here and there, but I'm sorry if I've missed anything major - I read everything, and you've all been in my thoughts, whether I've replied to you specifically or not. Things are really rough here. I've just been physically and mentally miserable since 2005 started, and it's driving me nuts.
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