Thanks Panda, I have been trying to get my Mother to go to Al Anon for so long but when he is not drinking she won't. She is very proud & private and we live in a small rural area so its impossible to get her to agree to go. I went to counselling myself after a huge public fight my Dad picked with me in front of about 80 people at my cousin's 21st birthday party. My doctor recommended a really good book for me about alcohol and the family, written from an Irish context and I bought a copy for my Mum. She has read it but she really does enable Dad's behaviour.
He was banned from driving for a year and she drove him everywhere, and collected him from work,(15 miles each way) the whole time. Dad didn't suffer at all as a result and used it as an excuse to just to pass time in the pub...