Reged: 06/01/04
Posts: 7013
Loc: Maine (IBS-A stable since July '05!)
Been there, done that. My first husband was like that, and then some. It started out being "just" emotional abuse, but eventually did end up being physical and sexual as well. You're totally right in thinking that things will NOT get better, because they won't. You're also totally right in thinking that things aren't right, because they're not - if your gut instinct is telling you to go, GO.
God, this sounds like my first marriage, right down to him being broke and bad with money. Don't let that guilt you into staying, ok? It's not healthy, and if your gut is telling you that need to get out, listen to it and get out.
Honestly, when I left my ex, I left without any warning or notice at all - just grabbed a few things in the morning before work, and never came back home. I went back for the rest of my things a couple weeks later. But our situation was different; there was physical abuse in there as well. To keep things as simple (?) and peaceful as possible, I'd say to find an apartment, and once you're able to get in it, THEN tell him you're moving out. And be prepared to do it THAT DAY, even if it's just a couple changes of clothes in a backpack. The last thing you want is to spend days or weeks or whatever living with a guy who's not only controlling, but also trying to manipulate you into staying.
Anyway, my inbox is always open if you want to talk or vent or whatever - like I said, I've been there, and I know how scary it is.
*hugs*
PS - Telling someone that they're crazy on a daily basis IS abuse. What a jerk.