Hi Michelle, You really worry me sometimes. It sounds like your need to control your weight is getting out of control - meaning you don't have control of it anymore. Your need to lose weight is controlling you now. I can only write this, because my second year of College I was admitted to the hospital two times for an eating disoder. I also understand that fear of gaining weight. Like you I lost alot of weight last year due to gastritis and I was at a healthy weight. I has taken a year to gain my weight back, but I feel so much better. Like you I struggle with wanting to keep losing weight, because it became my control issue. I was going through personal issues at the time and I did get to the point where I thought my eating disorder came back. I admitted it to my Doc. and counselor and what a load off my mind. With their help I figured out what my struggles were at that time and made efforts to change my behavior. Michelle I really encourage you to take an inventory of your life. Don't just look at the perfectionism issues-figure out why those false beliefs are there. I encourage you to talk to someone other than your mom. You don't want to over burden her. Can you get counseling from your pastor or another christian counselor you feel you can trust? Also keep on praying! I hope I didn't throw too much at you or offend you. Feel free to e-mail privately if you like. Take care! Barbara
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Re: Perfectionism?
It sounds like your need to control your weight is getting out of control - meaning you don't have control of it anymore. Your need to lose weight is controlling you now. 
