Many great points!
You seem to have done a really good job of figuring out what you can tolerate and what you can't. How did you go about working out which foods are problematic? Did you keep a food journal? Or what kind of challenging system did you use if you were doing an elimination diet? I have had lots of trouble pinning down precise culprits.
I agree with what you said about being a bit crestfallen. I'd certainly be near vegan if I could get away with eating anything. However, I also remind myself that if the choice is between a less healthy diet (but still healthy) and greater digestive stability versus ultra-healthy diet but lots of digestive stress, the former is surely better for me as an individual. Also, if the digestive system is in constant stress, I would surmise that its ability to absorb nutrients is compromised (and, from what I understand about the gut, general immunity would be compromised as well).
Great point about herbs and spices - those are great ways to pack in nutrients (and antioxidants and polyphenols) without any IF or fat.
In a previous post, I also pointed out the potential benefits of juicing vegetables, with several qualifications. If you use the right kind of juicer, you can almost completely remove all the IF. Of course, there may still be a tolerance issue because you are getting concentrated amounts of whatever is in the vegetables. However, I think most would agree that for someone with IBS, the same quantity of vegetables consumed au naturel vs. juiced would be much more problematic (due to all the IF).
I can relate about the gas. For me, a big factor definitely seems to be fruit and veg...I just haven't been able to determine which ones are the worst culprits (although eliminating the FODMAPs fruits and veg. has certainly helped a great deal). I agree about spinach - I really do seem to tolerate steamed spinach very well (I love it Japanese style, sprinkled with toasted sesame oil).
Also, I know that in my case stress is huge. I can be doing everything right, but if there's a lot of background anxiety, I can have lots of trouble. Have you tried the IBS hypnotherapy CDs yet? That definitely helped some for me in terms of the brain-gut connection side of things.
Chris
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Re: fibre and bloating
