I want to be clear that I never said nor expected that changing my diet would 'cure' my IBS. But I was of the expectation that I would feel considerably better, which I did not.
Feeling extremely stressed about everything I put in my mouth especially when I wasn't the one who prepared it did contribute to making my IBS symptoms worse. Adding that kind of pressure to eating is not only unnecessary, but it also does contribute to more intense IBS symptoms. Why? Because for me (and I suspect for many of us) stress is a HUGE trigger - in fact it is THE biggest trigger - for IBS symptoms.
If we do eat "trigger" foods (which I could never personally figure out because my reactions were never consistent and I was triggered all the time), we may feel worse. Why? Because our guts are more sensitive - that is true. As I said, even healthy people have problems with foods that are greasy, spicy, or too much of something like red meat. But I don't have to strictly avoid dairy, or any other food, but I do need to them in moderation.
The "food hangover" is not something I buy into anymore. I've stopped blaming food every time I have a flare up because it's not particularly productive or useful. I look instead to my level of stress or anxiety, and focus on the mental-emotional aspect.
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Re: Is food really the answer?
