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Tolerance is a door that should swing both ways
      06/03/06 08:26 AM
Sand

Reged: 12/13/04
Posts: 4490
Loc: West Orange, NJ (IBS-D)

If we tolerate people asking graphic questions about oral sex, we also need to tolerate other people saying they find those questions offensive. Both sides of the issue should be handled appropriately (no name-calling, no admonitions to leave) and I think this post has been pretty good on that score, although not totally satisfactory on either side.

Oral sex is an uncomfortable issue for many people and failing to be understanding of that fact is just as intolerant as considering any discussion of it to be beyond the pale. Someone who is quite comfortable discussing sex and IBS issues in general way (what position is best, for example, or even "try oral sex if you're bloated") may be quite uncomfortable with a more technical and graphic discussion of oral sex - or of any sex. To refer to people who are uncomfortable with graphic sexual discussions as prejudiced, intolerant, and inflammatory is no more helpful than referring to people who are comfortable with them as sick and sensationalistic.

In case you're wondering which side I come down on (no pun(s) intended), I thought the original question was appropriate - the subject line clearly referred to sex - although it could have been phrased more delicately and the subject line could have carried a more emphatic warning. I thought the follow-up posts were unnecessarily graphic and technical. But of course, as Heather pointed out, I didn't have to keep reading.

In a purely academic way, I am interested in watching this topic get pushed further. Since this thread is considered appropriate, there will eventually be another thread that pushes the discussion further into even more uncomfortable territory, probably - as already presaged - anal sex. Heather did a good job with this one; I don't envy her the future ones.

--------------------
[Research tells us fourteen out of any ten individuals likes chocolate. - Sandra Boynton]

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Entire thread
* ..Sex question
Alli
05/31/06 07:21 PM
* Re: Conclusion!
Alli
06/02/06 11:19 AM
* Alli
hohoyumyum
06/02/06 10:38 AM
* Re: Alli
Alli
06/02/06 11:11 AM
* Folks, if you are offended by sexual questions that relate to IBS...
HeatherAdministrator
06/02/06 09:41 AM
* Re: Folks, if you are offended by sexual questions that relate to IBS...
jules
06/02/06 10:01 AM
* Heather *DELETED*
Sara-Sage
06/02/06 08:04 AM
* You can email me about this
HeatherAdministrator
06/02/06 09:37 AM
* I agree!
bamagirl
06/02/06 08:35 AM
* Re: no, no
Alli
06/02/06 08:54 AM
* Re: In my defense....
Alli
06/02/06 08:23 AM
* Alli
Sara-Sage
06/02/06 08:35 AM
* Re: ..Sex question
Sara-Sage
06/02/06 06:10 AM
* Alli, what a mature and valid question to ask!
lorien
06/01/06 11:38 PM
* WHAAAAAT????!!!!
Bevvy
06/01/06 09:03 PM
* I'm letting this thread stand as is...
HeatherAdministrator
06/01/06 09:44 AM
* Re: I'm letting this thread stand as is...
Strixowl
06/02/06 03:00 PM
* Re: I'm letting this thread stand as is...
hohoyumyum
06/02/06 04:13 PM
* Re: I'm letting this thread stand as is...
Dajara
06/03/06 09:56 PM
* My mom did the same thing. *nt
hohoyumyum
06/04/06 08:12 PM
* Good call, Heather!
atomic rose
06/01/06 07:58 PM
* Re: Ditto
Blondie13
06/02/06 02:59 AM
* Re: Ditto
Alli
06/02/06 07:10 AM
* Re: I'm letting this thread stand as is...
Alli
06/01/06 09:52 AM
* Re: I'm letting this thread stand as is...
Shell Marr
06/01/06 10:03 AM
* Heather and Shell, I support your response to Alli's question
lorien
06/01/06 11:46 PM
* Re: I'm letting this thread stand as is...
Alli
06/01/06 10:20 AM
* This is very interesting...
cailin
06/01/06 10:15 AM
* Re: This is very interesting...
Alli
06/01/06 10:24 AM
* Re: Wow ...Okay...
Alli
06/01/06 09:39 AM
* Re: Wow ...Okay...
gigi
06/01/06 07:28 PM
* Re: Wow ...Okay...
Jennifer Rose
06/02/06 08:32 AM
* Re: Wow ...Okay...
Alli
06/01/06 08:05 PM
* Re: Wow ...Okay...
gigi
06/01/06 09:30 PM
* My goodness....
Shell Marr
06/01/06 09:49 PM
* Re: Really, it's not ok...
gigi
06/01/06 09:45 PM
* Re: Really, it's not ok...
Alli
06/02/06 07:07 AM
* Re: Really, it's not all that bad...
Dajara
06/02/06 10:12 AM
* Re: Really, it's not all that bad...
hohoyumyum
06/02/06 11:06 AM
* Re: ..Sex question
Kim2884
06/01/06 06:55 AM
* Re: ..Sex question
Sassi0619
06/01/06 06:12 AM
* Re: ..Sex question
Shell Marr
05/31/06 10:00 PM
* Re: ..Look Alli
gigi
05/31/06 07:52 PM
* Re: ..Look Alli
Gracie
05/31/06 09:51 PM
* Re: ..Look Alli
MamaCat
06/03/06 07:06 AM
* Tolerance is a door that should swing both ways
Sand
06/03/06 08:26 AM
* Thanks, Sand. I don't envy it either. -nt-
HeatherAdministrator
06/03/06 01:22 PM
* Re: ..Look Alli
gigi
05/31/06 07:54 PM
* Re: ..Look Alli *DELETED*
Jeano
05/31/06 08:18 PM
* Considering we do have teens and pre-teens here...
nomorepooch
06/01/06 06:10 AM
* Re: Considering we do have teens and pre-teens here...
LostCode
06/01/06 08:31 PM
* We have a twelve year old on the boards..~nt~
nomorepooch
06/01/06 08:41 PM
* Mature topics area?
MamaCat
06/04/06 07:20 PM
* Re: Mature topics area?
Shell Marr
06/04/06 07:25 PM

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