Just can't eat...scared...
05/19/06 07:05 PM
|
|
|
|
|
Memmles
Reged: 04/07/06
Posts: 101
Loc: Silicon Valley, CA, USA
|
|
|
Hey guys,
I'm feeling really down at the moment. I'm at a conference in LA with our staff. Wasn't really hungry all day (felt slightly nauseous this AM), felt o.k. for a few hours so participated in the conference a little, then came back to housing to rest 'cause I felt bad again. But was determined to hang out with staff for fun, so tried to go out to eat with them tonight. I bucked out on them last night when they hung out too.
Got to restaurant, ordered a side order of corn bread (we were at Roscoe's Chicken & Waffles- all fried stuff!), and couldn't even get more than a bite in before I felt completely nauseous & had this gag reflex kick in. I just couldn't (physically) swallow anymore - I wanted to gag.
I'm really scared - I lost 15 lbs in the course of the month of January (& a little of February), and if I weighed myself right now, would probably find that I lost more. I weight approx. 105 at 5'1", which isn't terribly underweight, but I'm slowly starving myself & I JUST CAN'T EAT regularly. This is dangerous. And it's scaring me a lot more than I normally admit.
I also have emetophobia (fear of vomitting), which doesn't make this IBS thing any easier & plays into the not eating issue a whole lot (if I don't eat, I won't get sick...).
I just wanted to vent a bit. I cried all the way home from the restaurant 'cause I had to leave early, couldn't do anything fun, and just couldn't eat when I know I desperately need to. If anyone else has worked through the not-eating issue, please let me know HOW you did it!!!!! I fear I'm going to end up in the hospital or do irreperable damage to my insides here... I just want to be well & whole again...ya know?
~ Emily 
--------------------
East Palo Alto, CA (San Francisco Bay Area/Silicon Valley)
IBS-C, pain, nausea
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
Posts
