Irritable Bowel Syndrome Message Boards | Re: Wait a cotton picking minute here! Who promised us no IBS symptoms?

Littlethree,

Please believe that my post was not directed at you. I was addressing the larger community here.

My belief is that you are dealing with is normal, and not in any way your fault. I am like you. I can't just stop eating! I just weigh 145 at 5'9. But because the food is just fine for weeks at a time, I just have a hard time believing it is the food that causes me to have a "D" period (which I am also having right now). I just don't know. Maybe I'm going to start tracking the phases of the moon. Maybe like werewolves, we go "D" when the moon is full. Seriously, IBS is an ailment and not your fault. Stress is a trigger that can make the condition worse, but does not create it from scratch. You are going through a lot right now emotionally and it would be predictable to think your IBS would get worse, but that is hopefully just a temporary condition as you deal with issues.

Trust me, as a gay guy, I got a lot of abuse at home and in school, and there are scars inside me that may never go away, NOT because I am gay but because how the rest of the world brutally reacted to that fact. Yet I do not think I created IBS.

The best medical minds don't know what causes it yet - they just aren't sure. They can describe it but not why it happens.

Please stay on the forum because the people here are very nice and kind, and they empathize and care. I just do not think you failed in any way just because you are having a flare-up. For all we know, it is some sort of periodic chemical imbalance in the brain/body that causes this, and that imbalance is impervious to anything you are doing. My sister had diabetes and she has very down periods (today, for example, she said she didn't want to leave bed), and I don't blame her for having diabetes.

Be kind to yourself. I just worry about some of the unspoken expectations that Heather and friends sometimes give in her books, e.g., that you will "get stable" and then she sort of gives the assumption that this will last forever. There are many levels of IBS. Such blanket statements are probably great for keeping us positive, but when we fail to stand up to those expectations, it can feel like a personal failure. I just don't see it that way, unless you go out and drink a gallon of whiskey or do something stupid like that to irritate your colon.

Take care, and keep writing. Don't be alone with this.

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