Hi Lisa! Sorry I didn't see this right away... the boards have been especially busy this weekend, and I'm having a heck of a time keeping up!
It's not the same for everyone, but for me, there is a very definite connection between my anxiety disorders and my IBS... so much so that when I finally broke down and started taking anti-anxiety medication (I tried therapy first, but after dealing with worsening anxiety for years upon years, I decided that medication was a good idea), I noticed a great improvement in my IBS symptoms. Again, it's not the same for everyone, but there's a definite mind-gut connection, and it certainly can't hurt to address anxiety issues anyway - at the very least, you'll be less anxious! 
Like I mentioned, I did try therapy first, and I totally recommend it, if it's something you're considering. I know what you mean about being embarassed... I've had generalized anxiety disorder since I was a child, and I didn't get diagnosed or get help for it till I was 29! I'm really glad I finally worked up the nerve to address the issue, though, because it really was my worst underlying IBS "trigger". I'm not "cured", mind you, but compared to a year ago, I'm a whole new person. 
I'm not sure if this was a helpful reply or not - heh - I'm really tired and I tend to babble when I'm not quite with it! Feel free to ask more questions, or email me anytime if you need to. I know all about how powerful anxiety can be! (Oh, the stories I can tell.  )
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