Yeah, "ashamed" isn't quite the word I was looking for, either, but if you had even an inclination to head towards that feeling, I wanted you to not go there.  Nobody HERE will ever think that you "deserve" anything because of how you treated your body in the past, so don't let your mind go there, either! It's a shame your family can't grasp the difference between dietary restrictions for better living and an eating disorder, but I honestly think that "normal" people will never really understand how EITHER problem works. I thank my lucky stars that my family actually never knew about my ED's - or, at least, chose not to acknowledge them - so that now they can chalk my diet up to a picky-eating phase and leave it at that.
It's really, really hard to overcome. Adam's father's girlfriend, the other day, said to me, "Look at you! You're getting fat!" 99% of my brain knows how she meant it; she saw me go from 150 to 105, and by "fat" she means that I'm getting my boobs and butt back. But that last 1% of my brain fixated on THAT F WORD and it's all I could talk about the rest of the day. Adam kept reassuring me that I'm not fat, but when things like that happen, it just doesn't sink in.
I tend to think it doesn't ever really leave you. Most days are pretty easy for me, I don't even think about it, but every now and then it rears its ugly head. Then I just have to choose not to act on it, which is hard.
Haha, Beth's a spy!  Think of it this way: if we didn't want people looking in on what we're eating, we wouldn't post it on a public board! I'm really glad it helps you, regardless. I stopped posting my daily meals because I tend to eat the same thing every day - I love to cook, but I'm essentially lazy when it's just me at home, so I just go with mindless food. I got tired of reporting the same meals every single day, so I figured I'd just get to the point and report calories and fruits/veggies, the 2 things I'm tracking. But now that I know you're checking up on me, maybe I'll go back to posting meals.
Yeah, I eat a lot of potatoes and spinach. Carrots, too. I really don't like a whole lot of vegetables, which makes getting my 5 a day really difficult sometimes. I try to eat potatoes instead of pasta, just because they count as a veggie. As for the other stuff, I cook a package of frozen, and pick at it till it's gone.
Yep, my bananas are fresh! The weirdest thing happened: I've hated bananas for *years*, but I ate one one day and suddenly I really like them! Go figure! I'm also finding I love peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, something I "hated" since I was a kid. I guess your tastes really do change over time!
Email, post, I don't mind - it's good to hear from you either way!
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Re: Thanks for sharing..
