ok, I'm back to feeling like crap. I just tried very calmly to approach the subject. I said do you even want to try to make this work. He said no, you're just angry cause you can't get your way. (which is not true at all, I'm so used to never getting my way with this kid). Anyways, I said is there something else holding you back because it seems like 20 minutes is arbitrary if you truely love someone. He says he cans till have a relationship and travel 20 mins. I said but then why can't we live together, I know we will be so busy and never get to see each other. I want you to be there for me and with me, even just to sit together while doing work. He again said you're just mad cause you can't get your way.
RIGHT NOW, I am so freakin mad. I asked if there was another reason and he said no, he just said there will be too much traffic and that its not worth it. I said then I will travel, and he said what would you do. I told him all of you guys' suggestions and he just answered with something totally unrelated, and said Ashley, its only three years why can't you handle this?
He doesn't understand why I'm upset, and why this is breaking me heart. I feel like he's choosing a job over us, and that he won't even go 20 miles or try to meet halfway so that we can be together. I don't think i'm wrong to be upset. He's so freakin stubborn and he won't even think about ways around it. maybe I approached him at the wrong time because he was just revising his paper, but I did it calmly and tried to figure out why he was doing this.
Now I don't know how to act. I go home for the summer on Monday, and we will barely get to see each other. The plan was to go home for the summer, until he figured out where he was getting a job, so that we can find an apartment together later. Apparently that is no longer the case. Now i'm scared about whether or not I should even try to spend time with him before I leave, if I should pretend like I don't care. I'm so confused about how to act. I don't know what he's gonna do all summer, and it scares me beacuse we will be leaving on such rocky grounds. This has gotten even more complicated.
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