After a very unhappy therapy session today, I'm starting to psych myself up to self-induce vomiting to finally face my fears. I've been working on this for one year now in therapy - and have made progress in many ways, but the prospect of throwing up is still this extremely charged for me. Since it has happened about once every 4-10 years to me in my adult life, I've built it up to be this looming danger that could strike any time but probably won't. I'm beginning to feel ready to face this head on. If it were elevators or spiders or heights or whatever else, I'd have to make the choice to face it. With this, i've been waiting and dreading getting sick, for the moment of my showdown with this phobia.
Talking about this in therapy today left me a total sobbing wreck. At this moment though, I'm feeling a bit more backbone and resolve to do this. I may try early next week when I don't have to work. Sometimes it seems like something I should and even must do, and at other moments it evokes sheer terror. I'll need some major cyber-hand-holding, if I actually do this.
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Ladies & gentlemen take my advice, pull down your pants and slide on the ice.
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moving towards "exposure therapy" for my phobia
