I'm having really painful cramps tonight. I feel as though I'm punishing myself somehow for believing I'd made progress! As I realized that I was doing a little better this week, I got really scared by the feeling of less fear. Because it made me feel unprotected I guess. I know this does'nt make sense, but here I am, at 230am with terrible cramping. So far I've been able to face it without the panic arising, but I feel it starting to creep up on me quickly now. Trying to breath and use my new strategies for coping with the pain without freaking out. Okay just took a walk around the apt. and also a hyosciamine. Keep thinking about the last time I had a stomach bug and "got sick", and how the cramps were really bad just like this. Hopefully this will pass. I heard in detail about a sick friend tonight, with ibs and other issues. I think that may have set me off on the path to this attack.
I'm trying to remind myself that:
Whatever happens, no matter how much I may not like how I feel, I have the ability to get through it.
I've gotten through a lot of pain in my life, this is one more time and I will survive this one too.
There are people who love me who will help support me through whatever I'm experiencing.
That no one likes to feel this way, that I just react to it more strongly than others because of my history.
*** Please send hugs! Bleah!
-------------------- Ladies & gentlemen take my advice, pull down your pants and slide on the ice.
Edited by hawkeye (03/28/08 11:43 PM)
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