Aside from a fiery case of IBS-D, I've been having seizures since I was 1. I have tics, jerks and spasms in my twilight sleep which have turned to jaw snaps and bites, and crunching jerking convulsions. Whatever these symptoms are, they're getting consecutively suckier.
My fibro doctor's words: "This is something else than fibro." He wants me cleared for MS.
So I'm about to meet my new neurologist. He treats my mom's friend (who has fibro and MS), and she seems to like him. I'm looking at a prescription piece of paper with fibro doc's scrawly handwritings for a MRI to look for brain anomalies. It's hitting me like a ton of bricks. *tears*
I don't want to be the sick girl who has to be rushed to the neurologist right away for expensive inconclusive tests. I want to be the girl who needs an operation to take out the bastard thing who's controlling her body so she can breathe the way she should, eat with joy, poop without a care, and get on with her F*^&ING life, get a JOB, PAY HER BILLS, and have a relationship! Or ten!
Why can't I be the tall girl, or the blonde girl or the clever girl, or the girl with cute toes, or the girl who likes hockey and television and good music, or the one who can tell a joke, or needs makeup tips, or the one with sweet breath, or the one with funny teeth... NOT THE GODD*MN SICK GIRL!!
~nelly~ *crying*
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|