Irritable Bowel Syndrome Message Boards | Oh my god my twins are back....

Hey everyone,

havent post much in the last couple of days as have been partying like theres no tomorrow...had a great time yesterday with all my coursemates...I had drank WAY too much by about 7pm and was my usual embarrassing self. Then went for a curry(a dairy free one) and demolished probably half the naan bread in the whole place

trying to soak up my drunkenness! I then went home at about 11pm and we decided(me and one of my flatmates) that we would go out clubbing...cos there was a HUGE night on and possibly the last best one of the year. So even though by this point I was nackered...and getting a hangover(as had been drinking since 4pm)

I forced myself out...nearly didnt go though...and anyways...drama drama drama....

Some of you may remember my HUGE CRUSH on one of the twins who lived at the same halls as me last year(Im waiting for sinead to pipe up

) well....they were there!!!! I nearly had a HEART ATTACK on the dancefloor I swear to god. It has been nearly a year since I last saw Dan...and the last time I saw him I had had a funny feeling that I wouldnt see him ever again and that that would be an end to that chapter of my life...having nearly failed my 2nd year due to my antics.

Well...since the last time I saw him I have had a few shall we say dalliances with other boys(more a snog here and there

) and had moved on and gotten over it as best I could. Ive become close friends with some of Dans old friends in the last year too and it was hard talking about it to them at first but we broke the ice and I finally felt like I was over it. Well they hadnt seen him for ages either cos hes always been ''locked down'' by the girlfriend who broke my heart last year....she had cheated on him they had split up and he took her back just during the time when something possibly could have happened between me and him.

Well it was someones birthday last night and they went for that and I nearly got the shock of my life. The weirdest thing is since christmas...although his name gets mentioned from time to time...Ive felt asthough I was over it and was never going to see him again. I was even joking with one of his friends about him outside the club lastnight before we went it which was SO STRANGE cos that rarely happens and of all nights he turns up then. I had also found some letters about him earlier in the week, written to me about the situation last year by the security guard here who you may remember was the reason I ended up meeting dan in the first place. He had also weirdly appeared in my dream earlier in the week...so it was almost as if I had been given signs that I would see him even though I hadnt expected it not one bit.

Anyways...point of me writing this essay...lol...is cos I didnt even manage to go say hi to him....I have no idea why...I was feeling hungover and self conscious and was just being stupid but basically I just couldnt get the guts to go over and speak to him...mainly because when I saw him all those feelings came back and I was scared talking to hm was gona do even more damage. However, I am now seriously regretting it having woken up of sane mind this morning...and Ive been getting told off all day by my friends...especially his...who had aparently told him I was there so it looked like I was avoiding him....now hes gona think Im a right freak....grrrrrrrrrr...Im so mad at myself...all I had to say was hi and how'v u been and all that...had it been a few hours earlier when I was very merry on wine I would have grabbed him

Im so upset now that I didnt even acknowledge him...I just feel so much worse.

Im being a pathetic girl I know...just needed to vent on here as therapy cos I knew a lot of you know the story from last year....but theres worse to come...cos now I have found out that next year(which is going to be so important for me) he is moving back to leeds to stay in the halls where I am(but will be moving anyway in july) WITH HIS GIRLFRIEND!!! So now I have to endure possibly a years worth of dodging him and her together when I will most probably cry!

Im such a bridget jones arent I!!! HELP!!!

What am I going to do...I thought I had got rid of these stupid feelings and now I feel like Ive been hit with them all again...and its so stupid I know...get over it natalie....but why did he have to re appear in my life again now of all times??? I just know this isnt the last Ive seen of him.....

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Natalie

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