Maybe you and your husband need to have an honest talk with the RE. This might help you decide what to do. I think you'd said you had agreed to try until the new year? This is only three months away. Do you think you can stick it out that long? Sometimes focusing on a tangible deadline makes it a little easier.
Don't have any advice to offer otherwise, I'm afraid. Try to take care of yourself, and keep the lines of communication open between you and your husband. You're a strong person and you WILL get through this.
-------------------- jen
"It's one of the most serious things that can possibly happen to one in a battle -- to get one's head cut off." -- LC