I KNOW this is easier said than done, believe me...
12/02/04 07:03 PM
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ecmmbm
Reged: 02/23/03
Posts: 1622
Loc: North Carolina
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I'm only just now getting over the idea that I don't have to please everyone, especially my family. It has been the most freeing process I've ever been through, truly changing my life. Not that I'm THERE yet, mind you! But still, I totallly relate to what you're going through.
We have 3 little ones and we live 3 hours from both sets of g'parents, who both live in the same town (where we came from). Talk about issues over who will be where when, man oh man! But now I tell them what we can do and offer them options. Usually it goes like this, we can travel at this time, otherwise you all can come see us WHENEVER you want because we and the kids are here just doing what we always do! It's been a struggle but slowly everyone is coming around. The hardest part for my mother is that my brother and his wife are never with us because they refuse to come. Well, I can't help that... it's not my fault and I can't be made to feel guilty for it.
So... you didn't need my whole story, but the point is, the holidays are NOW for YOUR FAMILY which is you and your husband and your kids. Start making those memories for THEM that they will remember. I don't think you want that to include a miserable stressed out mom. Slow it down to your pace.
And for practicalities sake, 3 meals in one day is absurd to expect of little ones. Mine would be bonkers. Just my opinion there.
Big hugs - I know exactly what you're goign through, but if you find a way to buck against it, with a loving attitude but putting you and your kids first, and still feel good about yourself for that, you may find you're breathing a breath of fresh air. (((hug)))
-------------------- Take care,
Michelle
...the greatest of these is LOVE. (I Cor 13)
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