Ruchie, sweetheart, when you say things that used to make you happy, don't now----that is DEPRESSION. And it is a chemical imbalance that you cannot control. Don't let people tell you "Oh, you just need to get out of the house more!" When you are seriously depressed like it sounds like you are, that will not help. You don't feel like shopping, socializing with others, and eating---and you can't sleep.
These are all the symptoms of depression. I hope to God that you have a good doctor (and/or therapist) you can trust. If I were you, I'd call the doctor's office and tell them you are worse than you've ever felt----and demand to talk to the doctor or nurse ASAP. They need to know how you feel. It may just take time for the antidepressant to work, or they may need to up the dosage or change the medicine. Sometimes if it's not the right medicine, it can make you feel worse. But if the doctor thinks it will just take time, maybe there's something else he could prescribe in the interim to make you feel better. You should not have to suffer like this!
My heart goes out to you because I have been where you are now, and it was the scariest and most difficult time in my life. I wish I were there to help you. Do you have a friend that you could call that could come stay with you during the day? If you don't even have the energy to call the doctor's office, please ask a friend to call for you. In my case, if it hadn't been for a sweet neighbor who realized just how bad off I was, I don't know if I'd be here today.
(((((BIG HUGS TO YOU))))). Please check in with us and let us know how you are doing. IT WILL GET BETTER, I promise!!!
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Ruchie
