Irritable Bowel Syndrome Message Boards | Re: Anyone remember my gay guy drama? An update

Hi Sara,

So I'll start with a couple things. 1: I sort of followed your inital drama but was away so may have missed some things. 2: I've obviously never met you or your friend so I can't say for sure.

But, I am kinda confused. No one says you have to be friends with him and if I'm in a friendship where the other person isn't putting in any effort than there's no point.

Here's where I'm confused though. He is gay, maybe kind of a flirt, but the fact that he's gay should instantly tell that he's unavaliable. The fact that you find him attractive and fun can definitely confuse the issue.

But let's look at it a different way, suppose there was a guy who liked you and was really interested in you, but you let him know flat out that you liked him as a friend but weren't interested in him any more than that. Now if that guy gave you lots of attention everyday, I think that you'd start getting weirded out. "Why is this guy giving me so much attention? He knows I've got a boyfriend."

Secondly I think there was a difference in the way men and women think (gay or not). You asked him if he minded that you keep giving him attention and sending him e-mails. To him, it was fine if you kept sending him e-mails. To him however, there's nothing in the question about returning any e-mails. If you had asked him if he'd send you back e-mails that you sent, his answer would most likely be that he was too busy.

Now with regards to the Mono, one of my friends got it in Highschool and I didn't see her for 4 months. She just slept the whole day and when I asked if I could come over she said no. She later apologized, but said that she really had no desire to see anybody or do anything, period. So I honestly wouldn't take it personally. I think the statement of him avoiding everybody is a valid one. As well, that could definitely explain why his eyes were cold and emotionless.

It's totaly possible that this guy is a complete jerk. If you're not happy in a friendship then don't be in it, but I just figured I'd add a bit of guy's perspective on things. (I don't mean any offence)

Good Luck,
Jamie

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