All Boards >> The Living Room

View all threads Posts     Flat     Threaded

Friendship Q oh wise ones!
      10/14/04 06:24 AM
daliatree

Reged: 07/10/04
Posts: 1176
Loc: Manhattan, New York

hello ladies
if you had been friends with someone for seven years who had a very needy, insecure, anxious, negative character and had made a suicide attempt at 17 (and is now 25) and STILL hasn't been to therapy even though the anxiety exists at almost of every turn, with little decisions and big decisions. And you were always honest with this friend, being there for her but reinforcing that you cannot take a professionals role and that her problems will return no matter what until she deals with them. Finally, after seven years and a terrible summer of IBS where you couldn't be there for her as much, you lose it with all her little worries etc and send her a long letter telling her about why you feel the friendship has changed and she needs to see someone.
She is furious and says you are so patronising and demonising her etc....she has shown the letter to new friends and they are all SHOCKED at what I said about her character.
Have any of you had a friendship like this?
I must say I feel mainly at peace. I didn't want to hurt her but I had to be honest or I couldn't respect myself and she needs to hear the truth about how she effects people. Those new friends are still seeing her fun side before she find the one she will lean on and then boom...lots of pressure. I do care for her...we had some good times....but she told a mutual friend after I sent this email that all I did this summer was moan about my stomach...hahahahaha what a joke....she had food poisoning for one day and was so miserable!!! anyway....wondering if anyone had similar experiences...I am sad she found me patronising because it wasn't my intention, but I feel like any way I would have written it would have been perceived as patronising....
I just got frustrated because in all the seven years I have known her she has remained the same.....and I feel like I am moving forward and she is still in the same place...


--------------------
Feel the fear and do it anyway!


Print     Remind Me     Notify Moderator    

Entire thread
* Friendship Q oh wise ones!
daliatree
10/14/04 06:24 AM
* Take it from someone who once lived in a nuthouse...
UrbanRain
10/22/04 11:40 PM
* want to know more....
daliatree
10/23/04 07:57 AM
* Re: want to know more....
UrbanRain
10/29/04 11:55 PM
* Re: Friendship Q oh wise ones!
amo616
10/16/04 06:13 PM
* Re: Friendship Q oh wise ones!
daliatree
10/16/04 06:16 PM
* Re: Friendship Q oh wise ones!
amo616
10/16/04 06:14 PM
* Re: Friendship Q oh wise ones!
daliatree
10/16/04 06:18 PM
* Re: Friendship Q oh wise ones!
Little Minnie
10/16/04 06:12 PM
* Honesty!
Bevvy
10/16/04 05:53 PM
* Re: Honesty!
amo616
10/16/04 06:17 PM
* Re: Honesty!
daliatree
10/16/04 06:20 PM
* Re: Honesty!
amo616
10/17/04 06:34 AM
* Re: Friendship Q oh wise ones!
Sara-Sage
10/14/04 10:09 AM
* Re: Friendship Q oh wise ones!
RachelT
10/14/04 08:07 AM
* Re: Friendship Q oh wise ones!
Nelly
10/14/04 06:41 AM
* Re: Friendship Q oh wise ones!
daliatree
10/14/04 07:33 AM
* Re: Friendship Q oh wise ones!
Nelly
10/14/04 10:17 AM
* thank you!!!
daliatree
10/14/04 10:20 AM
* Re: thank you!!!
Luther Maze
10/16/04 12:10 PM
* thank you again
daliatree
10/16/04 05:20 PM
* Re: Luther Maze: info for friends
dozyveeny
10/16/04 04:14 PM

Extra information
0 registered and 1969 anonymous users are browsing this forum.

Moderator:  Heather 



Permissions
      You cannot post until you login
      You cannot reply until you login
      HTML is enabled
      UBBCode is enabled

Thread views: 1168

Jump to

| Privacy statement Help for IBS Home

*
UBB.threads™ 6.2


HelpForIBS.com BBB Business Review