Feeling blue
08/23/04 08:08 AM
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bz
Reged: 06/18/03
Posts: 105
Loc: Brooklyn, NY
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Hey everyone,
I just need to talk about this to someone.
I'm married 3 years (we've been together 11). I just lost it last night. These feelings have been building up lately and finally exploded.
I work days and my husband works nights. I've gotten used to spending my nights by myself. The problem comes on the weekends. He sleeps until about maybe 2pm (I'm awake since 6am). He gets up, has tea, goes in the 2nd bedroom to watch the Yankee game (if not that then any other sport), then asks when is dinner, comes out for dinner, goes back in the other room. He is so preoccupied with TV and any sport it is unbelievable. He doesn't like to go to the movies, doesn't like to shop or walk around stores, sometimes we take a walk on the boardwalk.
I have brought this topic up before with him with no positive results. This time I have told him that I just cannot go on spending all of my time by myself. Did I mention that I take care of everything (cooking, cleaning, shopping, drycleaning, ironing, washing, on and on and on).
I don't mind doing these things but feel like I am the ultimate doormat and being taken for granted. I told him last night that he just assumes that I will always be here because I always am, but if he is not willing to pay some attention to me I just can't live like this.
This is my second marriage. My first one was mentally and verbally abusive, so I was pretty much beaten down for a long time. But now I feel that if I spend most of my time by myself anyway what's the point in taking care of someone and what feels to me like begging for some attention.
I told him that this was the last time that I would bring this subject up, that I was tired of asking. I'm sorry I'm rambling on and on, but I'm really sad and depressed and don't have anyone to talk to about this.
Thanks. Barbara
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