I can relate! One reason why I am so big (no pun intended--lol) on size acceptance and also anti-weight loss dieting, is because I saw what weight obsession did to my mother. She let it RULE her life. I swore I'd never do that.
I do think though that women who were always fat, even as kids, have the biggest problem in coming to terms and accepting their size. In that sense I'm lucky I was a skinny kid and only became fat as an adult.
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"A waist is a terrible thing to mind".