Hey Barb!
Heather should have a ful list of safe foods on the site somewhere - can't remember where thought, sorry . I like carrots, muchrooms, avocado, butternut squash, zucchini (well cooked tho), mango, peas (with soluble fibre)... Think that's it. Remember the mush rule - if its mushable, then it should be soluble (ya couldn't mush celery, could ya?).
I get calcium through my calcium enriched soy milk, so if the lactaid's okay for you, then go ahead and cook with it, etc. 'Fraid I don't know much about how the Vits/Minerals interact with IBS...some of the others are experts!
I think dried fruit are pretty high in insoluble fibre, but I'm okay with a little bit of raisins. Maybe chopping the apricots would help???
See ya around
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