Bev you had me laughing so hard that I read your post to my husband. The only mistake was I read your post in front of my 7 year old. He ran upstairs yelling someone poop a football out of their butt! Of course he is my ADHD child and his meds begin to wear off by supper time. It took awhile to get him to stop saying it.
Somehow I can picture you on that crazy diet. Although we all know you do a great job sticking to the right foods now. Except when you oink, oink the other day.