Long answer for a long intro. 
I too had a history of overdoing insol fiber to help with chronic constipation, trying very harsh foods like "Kashi" cereal w/ 10 g of insol fiber! All I got was a LOT of pain!! My doctor kept writing me prescriptions and laxatives as well. You may find they help you but they didn't help me, and none of them was ever offered as a long term solution, which is what I knew I needed. So I gave up on those after a while.
Your anxiety and depression issues simply must be addressed. If you're not already in therapy it would be crucial, others here find relief from the hypno tapes. Personally I found all I needed was someone to talk to who really cared about me and learned to open up to my mom-in-law. Now when I feel that "overload" we do a couple sessions of "email therapy" (she doesn't live here but can email from work) Most of all she points me to the Lord and learning to give my stresses and struggles over to Him daily has been the real life solution for me in that area.
Now, physically, I've found a system that works for ME but everyone is different, you may have to try a lot of things before you learn what works for you. I personally tried every kind of sol fiber supplement and had to finally determine they don't work for me. I am thin like you and they bloated my belly like a huge balloon, I just couldn't take that. Plus I had a colonoscopy and was told I have a pretzel colon, I wonder if the stuff gets all clogged in the twists and turns?? That's probably crazy, all I know is that route didn't work for me but work for MANY people here so don't give up without trying. I also had to give up ALL dairy and ALL forms of "whole wheat", salads, beans, gassy veggies like brocolli, etc. I can eat white bread or oatmeal bread, rice chex, bananas (some can't)), raisins (some can't), peaches peeled, soft pears, and veggies like french style green beans cooked well, cooked carrots, cooked squash, I forget what else.
Here's my regimen right now. Wake up and drink 1/2 cup aloe very juice on an empty stomach. It soothes the system (healing properties) and is supposed to have a mild laxative effect but is NOT a laxative. Then I have a bowl of oatmeal (quick cook kind, plain) with 2 heaping tablespoons ground flax seed. After it's cooked I add a little vanilla soy milk to make it creamy and tasty. Sometimes I add some fruit before nuking it, also adds some variety. With my oatmeal I take a probiotic (acidophilus) and my magnesium/calcium supplement. Then I'm up and around moving (easy with 3 small children). And I confess I still drink ONE cup of hot, caffinated coffee - I'm down to ONLY one cup a day but have to have that one cup or I get bad headaches and need the "pick me up" with 3 little ones offering me little sleep.  But I drink it after the oatmeal so my system tolerates it okay (I'm not endorsing this just telling you what I'm doing, Heather suggests cutting out all caffinated coffee). In about an hour I usually have some sort of BM, usually no cramping or straining either, unless other triggers have bothered me. Also important, I drink water all day long, I don't know how much I just drink it like crazy. Now if I don't have it I crave it!
Also at night I have a hot cup of ginger tea with lemon juice added. Some say the lemon juice added to a hot beverage helps stimulate the system to move. I sleep fine after that but wonder if it helps with the morning BM. I honestly don't know.
Also, I eat small meals every 3 hours like clockwork whether I feel hungry or not. This is important for the system, I think, and important for me as my problems had led me down a path of losing too much weight.
Also, if things don't improve and there are red flags, have them checked out. One red flag is pain that is not relieved by a BM. I had unrelenting left side pain and it turns out I had gynological problems that have been relieved since I had a hysterectomy.
Well, this is VERY long - goodness! Hope something here is helpful. Most of all, know that you are not alone, stick around and I think you will find lots of support and helpful info. And if you haven't ordered Heather's books yet, you really should, they are a MUST! She explained things doctors NEVER did!
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Take care,
Michelle
...the greatest of these is LOVE. (I Cor 13)
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