Hi,
I'm afraid I probably won't be too much help as I don't have any experience with kids and IBS etc. I just wanted to say that my heart goes out to the both of you; I can't even imagine how terrible this would be for a child to go through!
I know that Heather's book IBS The First Year has some great sections on kids with IBS; you can buy it or get it at the library, or most chapters are available to read on this website. That might help some.
As far as easing into the diet, I think Heather talks about that bit too (?). The most people do it I think is something like this
1. Cut out triggers (red meat, egg yolks, dairy, anything high fat etc... comprehensive list of triggers here) and let him get used to that first a bit maybe
2. Then continue to cut out foods (i.e. span of a couple of days tops) until you're into the 'What to Eat When You Can't Eat Anything' diet. This should not cause his body to freak out; if he really does have IBS (has he been officially diagnosed?) then his body should appreciate this. He might not like it too much as it doesn't offer much variety, but his body should be able to relax a bit on this diet because these foods are easy to digest and soothing to the system.
3. Include a soluble fiber supplement (if you're just starting one - and I don't know what the dosage would be like for a kid, sorry! - make sure you start SLOWLY). I got the imression your son was C, right? Don't stay very long on this diet then, and within a few days...
4. slowly start to reintroduce insolubles, one by one. Start with some well cooked veggies (served with lots of rice or white bread or something), soem of the quick bread like zucchini bread, smoothies etc. Try adding a bit of whole grains maybe, very slowly. This is the period where you will get an idea of what you and he can tolerate and what you can't.
If you are C it may take a few weeks to 'stablize'. Hang in there.
I'm sorry I can't be more help  Definitely check out some of those chapters of Heather's books that more specifically address the needs of children. Congrats with considering this diet though; it's been a life saver (literally) for many people here!
Anyway, best of luck, and do keep us up to date on how things are going with the two of you! HUGS for both of you
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