Casey, thank you for your reply - you know, when I woke up this morning I was wishing I hadn't posted about compulsive eating, because I know lots of people wouldn't consider it an eating disorder at all. I realise that the consequences are not usually as severe as for anorexics and bulimics -although your experience sounds pretty horrible - but I don't think most people understand what torture it is to be controlled by this thing. I tried making myself vomit several times when I was a teenager, from sheer disgust at what I had done, but I could never make it happen and had to give up. I had never heard of bulimia in those days, it was before the media coverage of these things had started. It was probably some physical quirk that saved me - I have only vomited a couple of times in my life, even though I get a lot of nausea - I'm just not very good at it!
The compulsive eating was eventually replaced by obsessive dieting. Tried more diets than I can remember. The best was Weightwatchers, the worst was probably the Cambridge Diet. My weight has fluctuated between 190lbs (maybe a little more - I stopped weighing myself for a while) and 140lbs just after my operation earlier this year. I'm 5ft 3in tall. I think I'm over all that now although I still get a guilty pleasure thinking about meal plans, weight loss targets, etc, and under stress I can easily get into what I call 'chaotic eating'. So my supposed 'entitlement' to eat whatever I want was just a symbol of freedom from all that, but now I have take things a step further ...
Thanks again for such a thoughtful reply. I am very glad to hear that you are recovering your health. It seems to be human nature that we don't make the changes we need to, until our bodies give us no choice ... Oh, for a little wisdom!
Josephine
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Re: Yup...
