Need support
#92049 - 07/21/04 08:51 AM
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BL
Reged: 06/01/03
Posts: 3522
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I'm having a really bad day. I went to see my psychiatrist this morning. Since seeing him last month, I quit taking the medication for bipolar disorder. I just wanted to take a little vacation from it! (I know that was stupid, but I wanted to see how I would feel without it.)
When I told him, he had a fit. I started crying (which makes him nervous. I've decided that's usually the fastest way to get escorted out of his office!) He said I have a habit of not wanting to follow his instructions, and I told him that wasn't true----that I had been taking the medicine faithfully for a year. He said he wasn't going to argue with me about it.
When he said, "You and I are just not seeing eye to eye on anything today," I panicked. I thought he was going to say he didn't want to see me anymore.
This doctor is supposed to be one of the best in the area. (He recently made the short list of the city's top doctors.) But he's very hard for me to read. He's very clinical, and not touchy-feely at all, just the opposite of my previous doctor.
I hate that the visit went so poorly.
I'd hate to see what he wrote in my file today. Probably---"Patient from hell. Get rid of ASAP!"
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{{{{{hugs}}}}}}
It sounds like your doc has a very poor "bed-side manner". If I were you, I'd start looking for a different one. He shouldn't have talked to you that way even if he disagreed with you not taking your medication. In my opinion he sounds very unprofessional.
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Some people aren't very good at expressing their frustration in productive ways, and it sounds like your doctor is one of them (despite being a psychiatrist  ).
From the psych classes I took in college, I just remember that it is considered VERY DANGEROUS for bipolar patients to go off their meds. He's probably just concerned because you chose to do that.
Besides, it sounds like he was in a bad mood before you even got there.
Don't sweat it, BL. Your psych isn't going to drop you! Next session will be a new visit!
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Christine
Those who can do; those who want it done better teach.
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Unless the doc is paying you to come in for appointments, you're the boss here.  You/your insurance is paying for his expertise - he should be worrying about pissing you off, not the reverse!
That being said, part of his expertise is knowing to yell at you for taking an unscheduled med holiday. Don't do that, OK?
--AC
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Hi BL,
Doctors don't like it when we don't follow their rules. Sometimes, I think maybe we know better than they do. Anyway, I'm sure that is not the first time that has happened. He could have been a little more understanding about it.
Why do you want to get off the med? If it is helping you, I would stay with it. Sometimes we think we are getting better but it is because of the med and then we quit taking it and relapse.
Barbie
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Hey Beagle,
I'm sorry that your visit went so poorly  I don't know much about bipolar disorder so I can't speak to the whole going off the meds thing, but what I can say is I sympathize with you about getting upset when the doctor got mad. I'm the same way, I have terrible "white coat syndrome" and I hate it when they get angry with me.
Hang in there, I don't think he'll drop you as a patient, he's likely just frustrated that you didn't follow his instructions.
Take care,
Kelly
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BL, this doctor is paid to HELP you, not leave you with a feeling of worthlessness. If he cannot help you, then there are others who can.
He may be the best on the record books, but if he can't listen to his patients without being condescending, then he's the WORST doctor, in my books.
I thought poorly of my doctor when I first met him. I thought he was arrogant and not very helpful to me. I considered changing doctors immediately. But something told me to wait -- he didn't seem terribly knowledgeable about IBS. No surprise there.
I came onto the Boards about that same time, and I began to get a lot of support (of course) and a lot of research and advice. Next trip to the doctor, I was prepared. I told him what I wanted. It was almost 180 degrees. He seemed to respect me more, and even asked me questions about my IBS -- and about my other genetic condition. We had a lovely conversation in which I actually felt his "equal." Ever since then, we've gotten along beautifully.
I would suggest giving this guy of yours another chance, but his arrogance really ticks me off. If my doctor had said to me, "You and I are just not seeing eye to eye on anything today," I would have said, "You know what, you're absolutely right, DOCTOR!" And I would have picked up my purse and walked out. I would have gone home, called my HMO, gotten the name of another doctor in my area, and made an appointment. I would interview other doctors as well, until I found one I could talk WITH.
Truly, if you can't talk with your doctor, he's worthless.
Good luck.
Bev
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<img src="http://home.comcast.net/~letsrow/smily3481.gif">Bevvy
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Thanks for your concern, ladies. I was so mad when I returned from his office this morning that I just needed to vent.
I know, I know, I'm crazy for continuing to see this doctor. I not only can't "read" him, but his office staff sucks. His nurse rarely returns phone calls, and I signed the authorization on July 2 for my medical records to be faxed to the IBS specialist and it still hasn't been done. He acted like he had no clue what I was talking about when I brought this up this morning.
But it's not just his office---the gastro doctor's office hasn't faxed the records either---and they've had almost 3 weeks to do it. I told him I had had it with the medical profession!
And yesterday I had to call my insurance company to straighten out a huge mess with my deductible.
Does anyone in the medical profession care about people anymore?
(P.S.---I saw 2 other doctors in town before settling on this one, and both of them wanted to medicate me so heavily that I never went back to see them. I'll take my chances with my bipolar symptoms before I'll subject myself to these new anti-psychotic drugs. I tried one and it caused a very serious side effect that can be PERMANENT. Thank God it went away.)
I know I should find another doctor, but I dread the idea of going through that again. At least this one knows my medical history.
I don't expect anyone to have any answers for me. I just needed to get this off my chest. Thanks for listening!
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Barbie
#92151 - 07/21/04 03:39 PM
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BL
Reged: 06/01/03
Posts: 3522
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I go through this stage about once a year. I think I don't need the medicine (probably because I am doing well on it) and I stop it. Then I start having problems again--and realize I do need it. Does that make sense?
Also, I have gained a tremendous amoung of weight while on it. I've talked to the doctor about it, and he says it's not the medicine. It may not be affecting my metabolism, but it makes me so tired and laid back that I don't have the energy or the desire to exercise like I used to.
I'm tired of being tired all the time!!!
But when I don't take the medicine, I'm mean and irritable all the time---and the doctor saw that side of me this morning! It's kind of like having permanent PMS. I'll pick a fight with anyone who crosses my path---the mailman, the clerk at the store, the telemarketer! I can get myself so worked up over the slightest little thing---and be in a rage in moments! I have embarrassed myself so many times by my outbursts.
I hate myself when I get like this, but I can't help it. I wake up MAD at the world---and myself.
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BL
#92163 - 07/21/04 05:42 PM
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barbie
Reged: 04/22/04
Posts: 2435
Loc: Texas
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What kind of med are you on if you don't mind my asking?? What about a smaller dose? Do you take it at night? Might be better if it makes you so tired. Do you take vitamins? Do you have a dog you can walk or a friend that can walk with you? That would be a great exercise and fun, too. My exercise consists of walking my dog, running around at super Walmart & mowing the lawn. My friend has an exercise bike in front of her TV and watches her fav soap opera while she pedals. Have you tried watching what you eat? Maybe smaller portions....Lean Cuisine's frozen dinners are great. Sorry for all the questions but I'm just trying to help.
Personally, if I had to make a choice I would rather put on some weight rather than be irritable....that's no fun. BTW I had the opposite problem....I lost too much weight because of stress and I just didn't look good. When you are old like me you don't look good too skinny... I am finally starting to put it back on. Guess we are never happy with the way we look!!
 
Good luck
Barbie
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