Irritable Bowel Syndrome Message Boards | How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb?

This was too funny for me not to share!! Enjoy!

> HOW MANY DOGS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?
>
> Dog Responses:
>
> Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is
> young, we've got our
> whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying
> about a stupid
> burned out bulb?
>
> Border Collie: Just one. And then I'll replace any
> wiring that's not
> up to code.
>
> Dachshund: You know I can't reach that stupid lamp!
>
> Rottweiler: Make me.
>
> Boxer: Who cares? I can still play with my
> squeaky toys in the
> dark.
>
> Lab: Oh, me, me!!!!! Pleeeeeeeeeze let me change
> the light bulb!
> Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I?
> Pleeeeeeeeeze, please,
> please, please!
>
> German Shepherd: I'll change it as soon as I've
> rescued these people
> from the dark, checked to make sure I haven't missed
> any, and made just one
> more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried
> to take advantage of the
> situation.
>
> Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it in while I'm
> bouncing off the
> walls and furniture.
>
> Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? I'm sorry, but
> I don't see a
> Light bulb.
>
> Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on
> the carpet in the
> dark.
>
> Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb.
>
> Pointer: I see it, there it is, there it is, right
> there...
>
> Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?
>
> Australian Shepherd: First, I'll put all the light
> bulbs in a little
> circle.
>
> Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear
> and he'll do it.
> By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails
> will be dry.
>
> The Cat's Answer:
> "Dogs do not change light bulbs. People change
> light bulbs So, the
> real question is: How long will it be before I can
> expect some
> light, some dinner, and a massage?"
>
> ALL OF WHICH PROVES, ONCE AGAIN, THAT WHILE DOGS
> HAVE MASTERS, CATS
> HAVE STAFF.
>
> What is a Cat?
> - Cats do what they want.
> - They rarely listen to you.
> - They're totally unpredictable.
> - When you want to play, they want to be alone.
> - When you want to be alone, they want to play.
> - They expect you to cater to their every whim.
> - They're moody.
> - They leave hair everywhere.
> CONCLUSION: They're tiny women in little fur coats.
>
> What is a Dog?
> - Dogs spend all day sprawled on the most
> comfortable
> piece of furniture in the house.
> - They can hear a pkg of food opening 1/2 a block
> away,
> but don't hear you in the same room.
> - They can look dumb and lovable all at the same
> time.
> - They growl when they are not happy.
> - When you want to play, they want to play.
> - When you want to be alone, they want to play.
> - They leave their toys everywhere.
> - They do disgusting things with their mouths
> and then try to give you a kiss.
> - They go right for your crotch as soon as they meet
> you.
> -CONCLUSION: They're tiny men in little fur coats.

--------------------
~Wookie

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