panic panic blah blah blah an attempt not to post the same old sh&*
#321676 - 01/04/08 06:46 PM
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hawkeye
Reged: 06/16/03
Posts: 705
Loc: NYC
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Hi Everyone,
I just wrote and deleted a long note about being panicked and why me, and why can't I get over this, my usual rant. I think you've all heard it from me enough though. I'm at the house I grew up in, in the second hour of an ibs/panic episode. I think I'm much more anxious and panicky after my car accident this week. So, here are some things I"m noticing in myself and wondering about. (While still feeling like crap, I'm trying to keep my mind off of it).
1. My anxiety isn't affected by the cramps going away. Tonight my gut is finally easing after hyosciamine, heat pack and hot tea. Still I feel equally miserable/panicked that it will be back and worse. Once the anxiety revs up I think its maybe harder to calm than my stomach. Maybe I should be taking a xanax instead of hyosciamine. I have them but never use them. I think I will take one tonight before bed.
2. When I'm stressed or anxious, I have fleeting "you're going to get sick tonight" thoughts all day long. I don't know how to stop them or quiet them. Its kind of like OCD except I'm not counting or washing or whatever, just "sicking"
3. When I'm like this, I have no real discernment of how bad my stomach feels. Just "miserable" or fine. So when I"m very anxious a little stomach ache, in my mind I'm envisioning the beginnings of food poisoning and another trip to the ER after 24 hours of what I consider the worst kind of illness possible.
4. It seems worse to call my wife over for some comforting. When she comes I tend to cry, act more panicked, hyperventilate. I do that less without her with me. Why is that? Am I putting on a show for her? B/C she's less than impressed, and its not helping my marriage any. Tonight I didn't ask her to come in, and I didn't get (YET) to that crying hyperventilating panic attack.
I've done so much talk therapy, emdr, acupuncture, AD's, A.A's, feldenkrais, hypnosis cds, Alexander, tai chi, more and more. Not sure where to go from here.
3 things on my mind are Cog. Beh. Therapy, Hypnotherapy in person not cd, and starting to smoke pot  Pot would be easiest to fit into my busy schedule! Any votes? Suggestions?
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Ladies & gentlemen take my advice, pull down your pants and slide on the ice.
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I have had my share of crying/hyperventilating attacks in the past. So don't feel like you're the only one. I have been seeing a psychologist for almost 2 years now, and that has been a HUGE help. She does cognitive behavoiral therapy. She has given lots of good techniques for reducing my anxiety...both before it starts and after it has already started. I would highly recommend it. I still have more anxiety than I would like...but no attacks or anything. Just every day kind of stuff. Someday I'm hoping to try an AD to get the last little bit under control. But I'm pregnant right now, so it's not an option. Have you tried keeping some kind of journal? That has been a big help for me. When I write things out it's easier to let them go. I often do that before a big event or trip. When I acknowledge my anxieties about going somewhere...and realize that a lot of it is out of my control, then I get more relaxed. No sense worrying about something I can't control anyway, right? Good luck with whatever you decide to try (except the pot).
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~Mary
Had surgery for rectal prolapse in Sept. '06 and feeling good now! Loving life with our IVF miracle #1.
 
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Hawkeye..
not that I smoke pot now but as a stupid 21 yr old i tried it. Even know you might think it will relax you some it has the opposite results paronoid. People prone to anxiety shouldnt try that as an option. However, I do take Ativan which is another form of Zanax and I take a half at night when my IBS flares and I cant fall alseep or if my mind keeps going (like you example of OCD). Try that first since it is an anti anxiety made for relaxation.
As far as the wife goes, I have read your posts before and it seems like she is alittle insensitive to your situation. Perhaps you should have her read heathers book. Maybe that will give her some insight of what you go through on a daily basis. Helped with my hubby.
Hugs** you will get through this
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IBS-C gas, bloating and acid reflux
Babies is the plan for 2008!!Hope this IBS cooperates.
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TO MARY
#321696 - 01/05/08 06:27 AM
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auntdebs318
Reged: 10/18/07
Posts: 367
Loc: Yardley, Pa
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Congrats are the pregnancy!!! How far are you along now. Just curious how your anxiety is while preggo? We are TTC and my doc said some people prone to panic the anxiety might surface more with the increase of hormones.
Thanks,
Deb
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IBS-C gas, bloating and acid reflux
Babies is the plan for 2008!!Hope this IBS cooperates.
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Re: TO MARY
#321705 - 01/05/08 08:26 AM
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Mary_V
Reged: 05/09/06
Posts: 544
Loc: Grandville, MI
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Deb,
I'll reply in a separate post so this topic doesn't take over.
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~Mary
Had surgery for rectal prolapse in Sept. '06 and feeling good now! Loving life with our IVF miracle #1.
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Thanks everyone. I was mostly tongue in cheek about the pot thing. I've tried and it just never worked out well for me. I thnk cognitive beh. therapy is in my future, and I've gotten two referrals but they're so far from my home that I keep delaying. I'm going to call them and see if they can recommend someone nearer to me. As for my wife, she's sympathetic to a degree, but its true that she doesn't really get it. She's been blessed with very good health so she doesnt' fully understand what its like to deal with it all the time. I tried having her read heather's book or to listen to the hypno cd for friends and family that comes with the ibs100 but no luck so far -
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Ladies & gentlemen take my advice, pull down your pants and slide on the ice.
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Panic is in my blood (mum, grandma) so I feel for you too. My mum once claimed me from emerg where I was hiding curled in a ball UNDER the stretcher. It was a bad attack. I didn't know what to do so I went to emerg. I figured it was the safest place for me.
As for you, hmmm. Yes, definately need to try some different therapy. My best friend did cog. beh. and it is like night and day the improvement in her life. She also did another therapy I'll find the name out of as it helped her unlock all the suppressed emotion and feelings from things in the past which were causing her anxiety and depression.
Don't start smoking up for the time being, hang in there. I find screaming sometimes helps!!
HUGS!
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Cassandra
Live like there's no tomorrow. Love like you've never loved before.
IBS A 20+ years, Chronic Migraines, Chiari Malformation (decompressed June 22, 2010), Brachial Neuritis, and ??? the list just keeps growing, but I'm still shiny side up! 
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Cassandra,
I feel like you really get what I put myelf through! I am def. going to pursue new therapy. What your friend did sounds like EMDR, which I tried but it left me worse off. I uncovered some emotional things that filled in a lot of the story for me, but it didn't really help me move on. In fact I felt more emotionally vulnerable for quite a while after it. Maybe the person I did it with wasn't skilled enough, but I've heard from a therapist friend that he stopped using the technique for the very same reason.
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Ladies & gentlemen take my advice, pull down your pants and slide on the ice.
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Not to strike up a huge debate, but I credit pot in helping to get my IBS into remission (before becoming pregnant). It works for some people. 
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- Jennifer
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Hawkeye,
Wow, I feel like we are one in the same, minus the sexual plumbing. Anyways, I have a similar thing with anxiety- I pretty much have obsessive thoughts most days that i'm going to get the stomach flu or food poisoning. So much so that I eat out maybe once a month tops, and always at one of the same restaurants off a short list I've compiled as "safe" and "clean." If I have the slightest inkling something might be wrong with me i freak out much like you, give myself diarrhea, and cry and hyperventilate...usually to my boyfriend. It's an awful cycle. I hate to say it, but i have smoked pot for relief, only at night if i have no plans, and it usually does the trick. I'm seeking a psychologist now, for help dealing with the anxiety. I'm not a fan of medication, the idea of side effects, really really scares me. Does anyone have advice about seeking psychologists? What to ask and how to decide on one?
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