Warning: Sex question!
#303400 - 03/28/07 03:09 PM
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Lisa Marie
Reged: 07/17/06
Posts: 1566
Loc: Lakewood, CO
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I have no one around me to talk to about this, but I figured you guys are really the best-qualified to give me your opinions. No one else in my life can understand my situation better than you all!
Okay, here it is: Do any of you turn down your spouse/significant other when they want to have sex because you have IBS symptoms? I feel like I do it quite a bit, and I feel bad about that. But my symptoms (when I have them) tend to occur in the evening, and feeling C or having gas/bloat doesn't exactly put me in the mood! I know DH understands, and he's very sympathetic to my IBS issues, but I know he gets frustrated, and he has every right to! Being on an AD doesn't really help either since it makes things "more difficult" if you know what I mean. So sex is often a frustrating experience for me.
I love my husband more than anything; it has nothing to do with that. I guess I'm just curious about how you all deal with that aspect of your intimate relationships.
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Lisa, IBS-C (Vegan)
Stable since July 2007!
Mommy to Rhiannon Marie (Dec. 13, 2008)
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I feel the same way. My husband is wonderful to but I know he to gets upset. I just wish I felt better I only have about 1 week a month were I feel "Good". We have been talking about having another baby and I wish I could just feel good engouh to even start trying! Just know your not alone. 
Emmasmom-Ibs-C
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Very good question to ask - my IBS-C when flared up definitely affects my romance life - the last thing I am intereested in is sex. Being cramped, bloated and full of spasms speaks for itself - does not lend to a good romance mood. It has played hard on my marriage and unforutnatley my husband does not quite have an understanding for IBS. I keep praying that he will. Debbie IBS-C
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Instead of intercourse, what about oral? Both men and woman love it and you don't have to worry about weight on your tummy. But if you don't like giving or receiving, then I think you're out of options.
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You're not alone with this one. My husband is very understanding when this happens. Generally, if IBS gets to bothering me, I rely on other tactics, if ya know what I mean  . IBS gives us creative license when it comes to these types of issues. It's okay to make up new things to do that are fun for both and don't aggravate your IBS.
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If you're not dead, you've still got time.
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Definitely not alone.. My bf and i have had almost no possibilities the last few months since my IBS got worse and worse.. and days i felt good enough became less and less.
Now im on Heathers diet and he is getting hope that soon we might again.. That would be nice!
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Arg, I haven't had sex in a while and the only thing I want before my trip is to get laid again!  Having D is not really romantic, as loose bowels don't like to be poked or pushed or shaken back and forth. A couple times when I turned down my BF I shudder to think what could have happened if my D had come back suddenly in the throws of passion. *arg*
All I have to do is mention my stomach and BF understandingly runs in the other direction. We've been really close in the last couple of weeks, watching movies on the computer and cuddling on the bed. But as soon as my stomach settles, I'm jumping his bones. 
~nelly~
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That is sometimes an option, but not if gas is one of my current symptoms! 
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Lisa, IBS-C (Vegan)
Stable since July 2007!
Mommy to Rhiannon Marie (Dec. 13, 2008)
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Thank you for making me laugh, Nelly!
I guess the one thing I'm missing that you all seem to have plenty of is DRIVE. Why don't I WANT to? To be honest, I usually don't care if we do or don't, but DH obviously does. I blame it on birth control, but I had plenty of "drive" years ago while I was on the pill. It's so frustrating!!
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Lisa, IBS-C (Vegan)
Stable since July 2007!
Mommy to Rhiannon Marie (Dec. 13, 2008)
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I don't really have a high drive, even now that my IBS is stable. About 2 years ago when my IBS was really bad, I had no desire to get any ever again. I was just so weak and tired all the time. And if I wasn't feeling absolutely awful, I didn't want to do anything that might change that.
Anyway, I understand where you're coming from.
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