size zero
#300390 - 02/21/07 09:38 AM
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seggy
Reged: 04/24/06
Posts: 255
Loc: North East of England, UK
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hi everyone, it's been a while since I posted hope everyone is doing well!
I'm in England and at the mo there's a huge uproar about size zero and how it's totally wrong and stuff. I'm uk size 8-10 so think I fit into that catogery (sp?)
I just feel like people need to be told, rather than what weight men find most attractive is that they are beautiful, for who they are rather than their size. Beauty will fade eventually anyway. Don't get me wrong I like to look nice and I love getting compliments as much as the next girl but it's the heart that really makes a woman beautiful.
Some people are bigger and some are smaller. Some men like women with curves and some like a petite figure. to be honest I don't think there is a 'perfect size' just try to keep healthy and be who you are. God created you and loves you just the way you are no matter if the world says you're too fat or too skinny
ok I feel better now 
xxx
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Nah, a uk 8-10 is a 4-6 us, which is still considered ideal (though far skinnier than the average American woman).
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and I HATE it!!! No one can understand that but me! I ideally would like to be a 3/4 or 5/6. You can find NOTHING in size 0 here. It's very hard and sometimes makes me resort to children's size 12 or 14  I'm almost 40 for crying out loud! I can't be buying that kinda stuff! If I get an xtra small or small skirt in Express or wherever, I sometimes have to pin the waist so I can at least wear normal clothes.
I have this fight with people all the time that they have no sympathy for me. I try to explain to them that it's just as bad as being say a plus size and not being able to find anything. I struggled all my life being "skinny" or too thin. I have accepted it but I don't like it. I don't try to be a size 0. I just am. Now those models that starve themselves to be that thin are crazy. It can't be good for you. I do think they look too thin. I'm nearly 5foot tall and weigh maybe 90lbs. Those girls are 5feet 10 or 11 and weigh 100lbs 
Anyway, sorry to rant but it's a very sore subject for me and you are right though, it shouldn't matter the size you are. It's what's inside that counts and I think people should look at that both ways.....heavy or skinny!
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~~~Lisa~~~
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Re: size zero
#300426 - 02/21/07 03:50 PM
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atomic rose
Reged: 06/01/04
Posts: 7013
Loc: Maine (IBS-A stable since July '05!)
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I'm beautifully, deliciously, curvily, fabulously plus-sized, which may as well be a bad word in today's culture, but I'm healthy, I eat well, I'm as active as I'm comfortable being, and this is obviously where my body wants to be. And yeah, I have bad days here and there, but I'm loved for who I am, and lusted after for how sexy I am, and I'm happy with who I've become.
Which is the important part. Not a size, not a weight, not an arbitrary NUMBER, be it a 0 or a 10 or a 20 or whatever. Healthy and happy, and beauty from within, is the important part.
I was a size 0 once. I was anorexic and miserable. But I have a friend who's been a size 0 most of her life, and she's healthy, so whatever! We are a broad, varied, and beautiful spectrum of people. Live and let live!
(And yeah, it only took me 32 years to get to this point. I thumb my nose at every industry and cultural standard that tries to oppress women into ridiculous conformity. Bah! LOL)
*hops off the soapbox*
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Casey
#300438 - 02/21/07 04:58 PM
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Flipada
Reged: 03/02/06
Posts: 1026
Loc: West Michigan, USA
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Ahhh, I wish I could be more like you. I've never liked my body. I'm normally a size 8 but I always seem to find some flaw that I can't get past and it's just stupid. I know that in my HEAD. I'm 37. Is there any hope? I guess I care less as years go by but I'd just like to drop the insecurities. It has really hindered me in my relationships. I have a wonderful man that loves me for me and I've gotta go and be a doofus.
But Casey, you have a fabulous attitude. I'm envious.
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Flipada - IBS-C "It's a gas, gas, gas"
**Lauren**
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The really sad part is that this attitude is all very new to me. Even just a couple months ago, I was still moping about being a size 20ish. My mother kept telling me - something somewhat newfound for her, too - to just cut the tags out of my clothes if it bothered me so much! LOL
Then my dad died. He was so young. And it still took a little while after that, but eventually it all hit me: life is TOO SHORT.
I mean, who the hell cares if I'm a size 20?
My dad? He thought I was God's gift.
My mom? She's called me the most amazing person she knows.
My friends? They all think I'm beautiful, inside and out.
My boyfriend? I'm his *forever*.
And, someday, hopefully, I'll have children, and I refuse to let it matter to them. I want to pass along the attitude I have NOW, not the one I had before.
I don't know. I'd like to think it doesn't always take some tragic life event to change someone's thinking, but I don't think it's something you can just change overnight, either. You have to work on it. I still have REALLY bad self-loathing kinds of days - I think we all do. But if you keep telling yourself that you're fabulous, eventually you're gonna believe it.
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their eyes
#300450 - 02/21/07 06:30 PM
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Flipada
Reged: 03/02/06
Posts: 1026
Loc: West Michigan, USA
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I know what you're saying. I'd just like to be able to see myself through the eyes of my children. They tell me I'm beautiful. So does my husband and others who are important to me. But I'm self-critical in every way...not just in the looks department.
I seem to get a good glimpse of my behavior most when I visit with my brother. He's a singer/actor/model and I listen to him cutting into himself after we think we've seen a great performance and I realize how I sound. And then I try not to be that way anymore. That lasts about 15 min....
Hypnosis would be nice. Wouldn't that be great if we could get self-confidence that way!?
I know I'm attractive. And I know now that since I'm having a girl, I need to change my tune so my little one doesn't pick up on her momma's bad attitude. That's more important to me than anything.
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Flipada - IBS-C "It's a gas, gas, gas"
**Lauren**
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Re: size zero
#300480 - 02/22/07 05:27 AM
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Toady
Reged: 04/06/06
Posts: 1299
Loc: A small city, Northwestern Ontario, Canada
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Well, I'm below average sizes too, if you can trust the tags! When I got measured for my wedding dress, by a dress-maker, I was an 8 - 10. She made my dress and everything fit wonderfully, until I lost more weight just before the wedding. Now, I'm buying size 2 pants and jeans just 7 months later, and I've only lost a couple more lbs.
IMHO, the manufacturers are making the clothing labelled with smaller size numbers to make the larger sized people have a different self image. ie - my size new 2 jeans measure the same as my size 6 jeans I bought years ago. With the average population being "over weight" according to surveys, I think that the manufacturers are sending the wrong message - that even overweight you can be a 2, a 4, a 6, etc, because they have manipulated the sizing to make it so.
I have no pre-conceived idea of what body image anyone here has because I have never met any of you in person. As someone who was 172+ lbs and is now 117 lbs, I still have a terrible self image. I have to make a conscious effort to not wear the big baggy clothes I hang onto in my closet, I look like a deflated balloon! ie - today I'm wearing yoga pants, size XS, and a XL cotton sweater. I look like I'm drowning in the sweater, but it "hides" me. (my tum is distended today) And as my DH tells me, I'm a "hottie" now, don't hide in big, baggy clothes. That is much easier in the summer, when I don't have to dress in layers though too.
Anyways, irregardless of what size you are, what clothes you wear, or how you perceive yourself, you are beautiful people, and I love you all!
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Cassandra
Live like there's no tomorrow. Love like you've never loved before.
IBS A 20+ years, Chronic Migraines, Chiari Malformation (decompressed June 22, 2010), Brachial Neuritis, and ??? the list just keeps growing, but I'm still shiny side up!
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and the designers. I've never been able to walk in to a store and find pants that fit me.
I'm about 5'7" and over the years I've gone from about 130 lbs to my current 170 lbs. My hair has modeled every conceivable style and color from .25 inch shaved to down to my waist, from black to brown to blonde to red to some weird purple-ish kind of thing. My wardrobe has taken some dreadful turns. Every time I change BC or go off of it, my boobs change size dramatically. I think my behind is made up entirely of cellulite.
The point is no matter what point I was at in the way I looked, if I stood tall and walked proud, there was always someone who told me I was smart or beautiful. There was always someone to tell me I was a good person.
The way we look means nothing. Who we are as people means everything. You children won't care about the size of your clothing. They care about your time. Your husbands will think you are beautiful whether you put on your make-up or not. And no matter what you look like, it has no effect on your heart and soul.
Bottom line, a beautiful person is someone with a good heart.
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***********************
If you're not dead, you've still got time.
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Your post brought tears to my eyes!!! I fully agree with everything you wrote.
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Amy
IBS-A
Stable and thankful!
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Re:Body sizes
#300694 - 02/25/07 04:07 AM
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michele
Reged: 06/02/03
Posts: 6886
Loc: southeastern michigan
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Boy, this is funny as i just went shopping, for bathing suits no less!!!! I haven't been on line for a few days, I will post an update post in a minute.
On the subject of bodies though....In high school, I was 5feet 8 inches and barely 100 pounds and boy, I thought I was FAT!!
I am now 36, have been every size for 2-20, my hair has been every color imaginable and my make-up styles have been all over the map as well.
I have found that no matter how fat or skinny I am at the moment, its all about how you present yourself. If, as Casey says, you walk tall and proud, people will think you are beautiful no matter what. I get hit on more now that I am chubby because I have learned this. It took a very long time and a lot of tears but I have finally learned this.
My profile picture is deceiving. Its 3 years old for one thing! I am now a size 14-18 depending. I have an unfortunate body shape. I have a bubble but, which I actually don't mind but than I don't have much of a waist and no boobs. So, when I go to the PLUS stores, the pants usually fit fine but all the tops are too big. If I go to the fashion stores like Express, the tops are too small and forget the pants!!! Not sure what a fat girl with no boobs is supposed to wear!!
We are taking a trip in a few weeks and I needed some resort dresses and bathing suits, not very fun things to shop for at my size!!! I finally, after HOURS, said screw it, I am a BIG girl and so what??!! I got a halter style dress that shows my curves, flabby arms and all but my but looks fabulous in! I got two tankinis (SP??) as well and I am just going to have fun anyway!
I may not be the best looking girl on the beach but I am going to have the most fun and I don't care what anyone else things. If I want to frolic in the waves like a kid, I am going to! If I want to go out for the night in a fun dress, I am going to!
I think a lot of people would be a lot happier if they could learn to accept themselves. Its a hard lesson learned but one worth learning!
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Taking it one day at a time.....
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Casey
#300708 - 02/25/07 08:57 AM
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Janey
Reged: 10/25/03
Posts: 1716
Loc: Maryland
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You inspire me to work harder at accepting myself and my body. I am trying to be proud of what I have accomplished in life and to be thankful for my blessings. At 49 I still find it diffuclt to let go of the image of myself in my 20's.
I think anyone that knows you sees a beautiful person inside and out. You are very lucky to have such positive feelings for yourself at your age.
I have tried very hard to raise my daughters to be strong, proud women who are beautiful without having to look like a model. I think this is something that many women from my generation lack. Way too much exposure to what the "perfect" woman should look like. It is ashame really since the majority of woman in the world do not look like a model.
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Janey
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Michele
#300710 - 02/25/07 09:04 AM
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Janey
Reged: 10/25/03
Posts: 1716
Loc: Maryland
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I think you are very right that it is how you present yourself. If a woman has confidence in herself it shows no matter what size she is.
I am so happy to hear you sounding positive. You have been through so much but you never give up. I think this vacation is the best idea and you and Will are going to have a blast! You both need to get away and have a little fun.
I hate bathing suit shopping! I really don't like clothes shopping either because nothing ever fits right. I don't know if clothes are made for the normal woman.
You know the women in Europe wear what they want and don't worry about what others think of them. You see women with all body types out on the beach in bikinis because they want sun and they don't care how they look. Too bad Americans can't think this way instead of the focus on the perfect body type.
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Janey
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Depends on the part of Europe. I thought the exact same thing when I first came to the US (I'm from eastern Europe)... that people accept themselves so much more here... that they are so much better and so much less vain.
People here are much fatter than in our parts of Europe. And they seem to be so much more OK with it... For example, someone who'se BMI is more than 19-20 would be considered plain fat (I was like that for awhile and my mom and brother would not stop with the advice how to lose weight). You basically have to be underweight.
I have a darker complection and in my homeland, that is a bad thing. I was NEVER allowed to wear cold colors, because they would not make me look lighter (as warm colors did). I would always end up wearing beige or yellow (i don]t like red and pink)... Now that I've been here, I've worn so much blue (my favorite color)! I even wear black! Or snow white (oh, my, that was THE forbidden color)...
My mother complained at first, but she got used to seeing pictures with me dressed in colors that "don't sit well with my complection"... Heck, I don't care, I like them...
I think the whole thing lies in the fact that we, as women, have to reming ourselves that what's inside is what makes us beautiful. The culture tells us different, but that's what the Bible sais. The culture in my homeland is one step ahead of the one in the US in that regard, for various reasons, so I am enjoying the more laid back atmosphere here.
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I agreee that it has gone TOO FAR with the whole number thing. And we wonder why these tennagers look unhealthy nowadays. Size 0 sounds stupid & unhealthy! Why don't the doctors speak up? There's enough of them around....
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Kiwi
IBS-C
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When I was a kid
#301037 - 02/28/07 07:45 PM
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Nelly
Reged: 08/06/04
Posts: 4381
Loc: Within stray mortar fire of DC
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They didn't have a size 0 when I was growing up. I was 14 years old, 5'8" and 76 lbs when I started high school.
I guess I could have used a size zero long then.
I think the trend came out of tweens and teens wanting to wear adult fashions. Mary-Kate and Ashley said they started their clothing line because they had to buy adult clothes and have them tailored because there were no cool clothes in girl sizes.
Instead of shopping in the Juniors section, now teens go directly to the adult section and choose the smallest sizes. Size zero is a sick goal for average adults. But I can see the appeal for kids.
One thing I remember from the '90s... I went to school in the UK in '94 and when I returned in the '00s, I was appalled when I saw how skinny the girls had become. The average weight looked like it had dropped by 20 lbs. I saw first hand what anorexia and bulimia were doing. I agree it's a HUGE problem in England on a scale no one can help but noticing. I was appalled and sick when I saw the waifs where I had formally seen apple cheeked, healthy girls. I haven't to date seen anything like that phenomenon in the US and I hope I don't.  
~nelly~
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