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Thanks Angela. Yes, they use the mtx a lot to induce miscarriages. Not sure why I never had a shot, always the d&c, hmm...anyways the list of side effects is daunting but at this point, I just need to feel better. The long term effects of steroids are worse than the mtx so I guess its the lesser of two evils. 
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Hi Michele,
I have been following along with all of health issues you've had over the past year and they are truly heart breaking.
I know that these decisions must have been very hard for you to make but I think you've made the right decision. You have tried a lot of different meds over the past year and nothing has been working for you. My friend has Chrohn's (I think I mentioned this before) and she is taking methotrexate and remicade. She's been on it for just over a year and is doing well.
I really hope that this new medication works for you.
Jenn
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Dear Michele
My heart is bleeding for you. I'm fairly new to the boards but have been following your painful journey with much admiration. I hope the methotrexate will relieve your symptoms and be gentle on your body. If is so frightening to read the list of possible side effects that one may experience with certain medications and so difficult to make those treatment decisions. I just recently turned down botox injections in my neck (for neck pain) after reading all the patient disclosure papers I had to sign (more like doctor protection papers). I decided to get a second opinion and may still get the treatment but not until I'm convinced that it is the way to go. As with anything you have to weigh the risks and benefits. Sounds like you have done your research and are making a good decision based on experience and knowledge.
By the way, the pics you posted of "the boys" are just adorable. There's a lot of love in those two little fur bundles.
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I know it won't lessen the pain of not having children but I have quite mild IBS compared to most and having two children under 4 which can be a massive challenge on a daily basis just having the IBS - it gets worse when they start asking to go places and do things and they need to get out of the house to school etc and you have to try and manage it all around the IBS. The guilt makes the IBS worse and its one massive challenge. Forget sleeping, you won't get the chance to sleep during the day and very often not through the night either. I think the others on this board are right - think of your health first then think of children second. On a positive note I have two friends who were told they would not have children with various illnesses and both have gone on to have two children each. Never say never - if you get your health sorted your state of mind may help your fertility. Good luck sounds like you deserve it xx
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Your right, you have to outweigh the benefits over the possible complications. I'm already on some pretty nasty medications but I need to do whatever possible to feel better. If the complications arise, than at least I know I've tried everything to get well. If the drugs take some time off my life, hopefully at least the quality of my life will have been improved for it.
Thanks for the compliments of my furbabys, Halrey is sitting next to me on my desk as I type and little Oliver is sleeping on my feet! 
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Thanks Jenn. It does seem to help a lot of people, if you can tolerate it. I'm hoping the rheumy won't have any issues going straight to the injections as I just know my tummy can't handle any more right now.
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I'm glad to hear your friends were eventually able to have children, its a difficult thing to go though.
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Just wanted to send you a positive word about methotrexate... My mom has had RA since her 20s (she's now in her 50s). She has been taking mtx for years (probably around 15+), and she has never had any bad side effects. It has been such a lifesaver for her! She was even able to run a home daycare for several years. Until the past couple of years, she hasn't had to change her meds, but she now takes a weekly injection of Embril, which works in conjunction with the mtx to help slow down the RA progression.
I realize everyone is different, but mom said she never felt any negative side effects... just the freedom from constant pain and stiffness. She takes 2 pills twice a week, and she said she's never had drowsiness from it either. Oh, and she only has to go in for bloodwork every 4 months. The more frequent checks are just when you're getting started, I think. She also said she has several friends and relatives that take mtx, and she said none of them have complained of side effects from it.
Good luck! Maybe this will be the answer you're looking for! I realize it may be a permanent answer to your struggle to conceive, as well, but that doesn't have to be such a bad thing. There are lots of kids who need loving parents like you! My husband was adopted, and there are 4 other adopted children in his extended family. It doesn't have to cost a fortune, either. Just focus on your health and getting to the point that you're able to care for a child... then you can try to figure out which way you want to go about it.
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Oops
#287585 - 10/23/06 02:02 PM
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Sand
Reged: 12/13/04
Posts: 4490
Loc: West Orange, NJ (IBS-D)
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That line should have said, "weight GAIN was one of the reported side-effects of this chemo cocktail". I guess my "life is not fair" didn't make much sense with the "loss" in there. If methotrexate has weight loss as a symptom then it must be one of the other drugs in the cocktail that causes the weight gain. The real point I was trying to make was that for a lot of people the side effects were so mild they didn't even lose weight.
As for hair, what I was told about the cocktail was that hair would thin but probably not be lost completely. Again, I don't know if that was from the methotrexate or from one of the other drugs. (Although you have a pretty enough face that you could probably get away with being bald. Add some big earrings and necklace and lots of eye makeup - very striking! )
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[Research tells us fourteen out of any ten individuals likes chocolate. - Sandra Boynton]
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Wow, it sounds like the mtx had really helped your mom, thats wonderful. I have heard of people having really good results with it. I'm trying to be positive and hope it helps me as much! Thanks for sharing your moms story.
You are right, once I am well, than I can concentrate on other aspects of my life. Thank you for the support!
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