husband thinks I just need to "change the way you think."
#279258 - 08/21/06 09:05 AM
|
|
|
|
|
|
I've recently started taking Zoloft again for anxiety and have been having some very rough times. Tire, more anxiety, frustration. Then my husband gets upset that I have started medication again after getting off of Effexor. He says the meds make me "crazy" and he doesn't know who I'll be from one minute to the next....I don't feel that way....I feel better on the meds. He told me that "you just need to change the way you think and quit being nervous all the time." I told him it was a chemical imbalance and that it wasn't any different than a diabetic needing insulin. He rolled his eyes. His attitude is just adding to my anxiety. I go see my doctor in about an hour to discuss my options. I told my husband when my appt. was and at first he got all defensive and said he didn't want to go because he had his ideas and they didn't match the doctors and he'd say the wrong thing. Well then this morning he asked when my appt. was and said he'd try to be there. I told him not to worry about being there unless he wanted to. So not sure if he'll be there or not. I'm so tired of waking up in the morning nervous. As the day goes on it gets better, but mornings are hell. Plus that just adds to my IBS-D.
Just needed to vent....thanks for listening.
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
I know how you feel.. My fiance says the same thing, *you need to learn to chill* or *you need to learn to relax* blah blah blah... So I hear ya.. but you know what? the hypno cds actually helped this..
I have a major fear of my fiance going out and drinking with his guy friends when i'm not around.. It's not that I don't trust him persay, but to be completly honest, I don't trust other women.. I know some females try to take advantage of drunken guys and when that ends up happening to you (a few times) (your guy cheats on ya because he was *taken advatage of* it kinda tends to stick in your mind for awhile) Well, last night one of his friends from high school was in town and wanted to go for a couple drinks, and ya know what happend? I didn't get the panic attack that i usually get.. I told him to have fun and not keep me up all night with his drunken chatter... I wasn't worried or nervous at all... and I tribute that to the hypnotherapy.. I'm not on any anti-anixety meds, dispite the suggestion of my mother and the therapist I was seeing last year around this time.. I find that I am alot more calm and can deal with things a bit easier.. If you haven't tried the cds yet, I definatly suggest them.. After all, what have you got to loose??
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
thanks....I do have the CDs and at one time I got about half way through the program....then got busy with the rush of life and work and never finished. I have tried to get back with the program, but just don't have the time to devote to myself. it's so frustrating
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Oh sweetie, I'm sorry your hubby isn't being more supportive. Its hard enough to feel sick and anxious all the time and he certainly isn't helping any. Talk to the doctor and do what you feel is best for you. Big hugs.
--------------------
Taking it one day at a time.....
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Actually, your husband is right. However, he is wrong as far as thinking it is so easy to do. We were not given any skills or method to change our thinking. This book really helped me with my anxiety. "From Panic to Power" by Lucinda Bassett. Betst 13 bucks you can spend. Believe me.
--------------------
Had my IBS since 2001 after 9/11
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
People who aren't in the same situaton can't relate or understand how we feel. I am lucky because my husband has colitis (not lucky that he has it, but lucky that he can relate  ). He understands stomach issues. He doesn't understand the fear associated with leaving the house as much.
I think that the best thing that you can do is show your husband that you are trying and ask him to meet you in the middle. Probably easier said than done but you never know.
Good luck! We're all here for you.
--------------------
***********************
IBS-A, with bloating and gas as my predominant symptoms
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
Bad hubby
#279345 - 08/21/06 03:20 PM
|
|
|
|
Nelly
Reged: 08/06/04
Posts: 4381
Loc: Within stray mortar fire of DC
|
|
|
His attitude makes me want to scream! You don't deserve him unloading on you like that, especially between switching meds.  
It's not in your head, and he should be happy you're finding medicine to make you feel better! Just wait til he gets an invisable illness...
~nelly~
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
They just don't get it! (Husbands!) Unless you suffer with anxiety you can't understand what it's like. When I was going through a rough time (many, many years ago)my then boyfriend, now husband, actually could not take my anxiety problems and actually broke up with me after dating 7 years!!! Thank goodness I got better and guess what he came back to me! I worry to this day that I don't ever have a bad anxiety attack or flare up for fear of his reaction. OMG will he divorce me???? 
I feel the same way in the mornings though Nuggs. Why is that? After a nights sleep, when I'm getting ready in the morning for work, I sometimes get anxious and think "where did this come from?".
Hope you are feeling better and that hubby came to the appt. 
--------------------
~~~Lisa~~~
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
Did you husband show-up?
--------------------
***********************
IBS-A, with bloating and gas as my predominant symptoms
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
|
|
First of all....I want to thank you all for your wonderful support. It really helps to know we are all here for each other.
My husband did go to my doctor's appt. with me and brought his attitude with him. He even told my doctor....."they've done all these tests on her and all came back normal....so that tells me that this is all psychological." Shouldn' t she be treated for the cause instead of taking meds for the symptoms. He confronted him on everything the doctor was trying to explain. I was bawling my eyes out. I could tell the doctor was getting frustrated with him, too. To make a long story short....I am going to go back on Effexor....even though I don't really want to....it made me feel the best.
Hubby and I had a long discussion last night about a few things and hopefully things will get better between us, too.
Thanks again.
{{{hugs}}}
Print
Remind Me
Notify Moderator
|
Posts
