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It's nice to feel wanted and special, but sweetie, take your time. You were hurt very badly and I don't want to see you make a mistake because you are hurt. I wish you the best, no matter what you decision is though.
Cassandra
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Cassandra
Live like there's no tomorrow. Love like you've never loved before.
IBS A 20+ years, Chronic Migraines, Chiari Malformation (decompressed June 22, 2010), Brachial Neuritis, and ??? the list just keeps growing, but I'm still shiny side up! 
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Hi there,
I think it's really nice that you've found someone to chat to and that it is making you feel good about yourself, but I would definitely definitely wait until your divorce is final before you get involved in any kind of relationship that could be construed as romantic.
I think that Trevor could, and from his past behaviour probably *would*, use whatever he can against you to get more custody of your daughter. It's not fair to her to say that because he did it, so can you.
From the replies to other people's posts, you seem pretty convinced that going for it is what you'll do, so I guess we can't talk you out of it.  But I'd just agree with others and if you must, do so very cautiously. You don't want to regret it later if it effects the rest of your life (re: divorce settlement, custody). You know what the say about an ounce of prevention..
Good luck with everything!
**hugs**
Steph
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~~I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell-I know right now you can't tell~~Matchbox 20
IBS-D,pain.
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Cookie,
I want you to know I think you have a great head on your shoulders. I know you are looking at this though every angle available to you. However, you will discover some day what we're all talking about. Because of what you've been through, this seems to be a great fix. But you have to know that right now, no matter how much talking you've done with this guy, you're still wearing rose-colored glasses.
I know where you're at and I know what you're feeling and I'm sure you're frustrated because you're not getting the responses you want. And b/c I've been there, my guess is that you'll do it anyway. But the last thing I'll post in this area is to just not get your daughter involved. Just don't do it. Just put it out of your head. Just tell yourself that no matter what happens with this guy, that you won't even introduce them to each other (even under the disguise of friends) for a minimum of 6 months. Make yourself that promise and I can tell you that you won't be sorry.
You may not want "revenge" any more but that doesn't mean that he won't be out to get YOU. Regardless, because Trevor has done the wrong thing, unfair as it is, you have to be vigilant in being the one that does the RIGHT thing. ALL the time! Some day your daughter will know all about what happened and she will be thankful that you never said an unkind word about her dad in front of her and that you did the right thing.
I don't want to sound like the bitter old gal here and I'm sure that's how I seem so now that I've said my peace, I'll give it a rest.
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Flipada - IBS-C "It's a gas, gas, gas"
**Lauren**
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It isn't what I want to hear,thats ok too... and I do have my ideas, but there is certainly no way in HELL I would bring Kayleigh into anything for eons, at least 6 months. No way no how. I am thinking of her needs first, don't you even think about worrying about that.
I do NOT want Trevor to even be AWARE of it if I was to go on a date. He has told me recently, however, that he wants me to get out there and date, and he'd be fine with me introducing a guy to his kid, as long as he treats us both well. I said "What, you actually want someone to treat me good?" and he said absolutely, he wants to see me happy in a relationship that's good for me.
That being said, I know there's anger there in him still and if I did date this guy, i would keep it from Trevor a while because I wouldn't want him to have ammo against me in court. I'm planning on starting divorce proceedings soon if we can.My dad has offered to fund it and we pay him back. And I am documenting EVERYTHING Trevor says to have on hand just in case.
Of course, if I did date this guy, then I guess it makes my argument about trevor cheating null and void. He's been good and paid everything he needed to on time for us, and has been very there for his daughter, even bringing her to work and taking her at 4:30 Am every day so I can work.I've never really doubted his dedication to his daughter, I've just sometimes questioned his maturity in thinking things through. I think now that most of the insanity has subsided with us, he will be a devoted and good dad, albeit slightly less than before.
I am amazed that things got as ugly as it did with us but I feel very at peace with the whole thing.....not because of this new interest, but because my dad came up for a week and butted heads with me on everything I defended trevor for, and FORCED me to see where trevor really is. It's not worth it for me to be angry. it's only worth it for me to make sure he pays child support, that we have a fair agreement, and that MY happiness is paramount.
By the way...
Maybe it's rose colored glasses but I do wear them a lot. I am one of those girls who sometimes learns best the hard way. 
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Keep on keepin' on...
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