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Actually I almost be afraid of him being around any teenaged babysitter you might have for Kayleigh. Corrupt the babysitter and have no one watching Kayleigh...that scares me more.
I just can't believe how sick he is to even joke about that. Something is seriously wrong with him if he thinks that is okay. I don't know how the laws are where you live, but possession of child/underage porn is against the law. Even when it is barely of age, they seem to crack down on that. I would be afraid to have any of that on your computer or in the house that it might cause you problems.
Still makes me sick that he would joke about it. I think the cardboard box might be too nice of accommodations for him at this point.
Michelle
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but of course left out the 17 thing. She is just sick over it and told me I shoulda kicked him out last night. Yeah, I shoulda. One more month, less than that. I'll keep the peace while i get a lawyer and counselling and become fabulous without him.
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Keep on keepin' on...
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OMG...
#267349 - 06/02/06 08:00 PM
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hohoyumyum
Reged: 05/28/03
Posts: 2263
Loc: SacTown, CA
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Please be very careful. I know you will be but that's just not right that he'd even joke about that.
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If you're not dead, you've still got time.
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Hmmmm....sounds like I hear you drafting your Teacher of the Year/Decade/Century award speech already? Let me know when you are ready to practice with an audience. I can cheer really loudly for you from here in the States. 
-Michelle
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I hope for kayleighs and my sake that he gets his crap together and grows up and holds up his end of the legal bargain, which we haven't set up yet. I lost the guts to see a lawyer yesterday and after finding this out, am kicking myself. I'm wearing my rings, but on the wrong hands! 
i ahve amazing self control I guess. I am basically telling him he's an idiot, he's nuts and whatever, but he's Mr I do what I want and you can't change me....so it'd go in one ear and out the other.
He needs help though.
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Keep on keepin' on...
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kick him out if you can.. if his own mom agrees, thats got to stand for something. I know its very hard for you financially, but relying on him is still allowing him to play tricks with your mind.. and its letting him manipulate you into thinking you need him to survive. Additionally, it will be hard to move on and become that fabulous woman when a man you love, but treated you like crap lives under the same roof. If you have to wait you have to wait, but I'd try to find ways around it and research other options. Having him there is putting a damper on you realistically being able to move on with your own life.
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Re: Craziness
#267384 - 06/03/06 07:38 AM
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Flipada
Reged: 03/02/06
Posts: 1026
Loc: West Michigan, USA
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When you say you lost your guts (getting a lawyer) what do you mean? What are you feeling? Are you afraid of how he will react if you get one? Are you afraid that getting a lawyer might make it all too real?
I believe it was only days ago that you were sure that he wouldn't see someone else..that he wasn't that kind of guy. And some of us said, that you never really know a person.
I'm not pulling an I told ya so, but I want you to think about why it is you are resisting getting a lawyer. And maybe part of it is that you still truly believe that he won't take more advantage of you and your daughter. But those of us that have been in this position I'm sure are just dying that you're dragging your feet on the lawyer thing.
Trust me when I say that it can't hurt to get a lawyer. It can only help. You have to stop thinking about him and his feelings all together and what you think you know about him or what you think he'd do, and take care of yourself and your daughter. SHE is number one. You have to take steps to protect her whether her dad is in the picture or not.
I hope this doesn't come across as too harsh but I see a little bit of you in the old me and I just want for you the best. I sense your hesitance and I want to help push you along as others do here. As women with experience in this area, we really are just trying to help.
Get that lawyer, first thing on Monday. No more excuses. You can always find time to talk on the phone....even if you're teaching (planning hour, lunch period, after school). Just do it. Please.
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Flipada - IBS-C "It's a gas, gas, gas"
**Lauren**
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 Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, “I will try again tomorrow”. Mary Anne Radmacher
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Agreed
#267404 - 06/03/06 10:18 AM
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hohoyumyum
Reged: 05/28/03
Posts: 2263
Loc: SacTown, CA
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Definately get that lawyer. He obviously has issues and it's not your job to fix them. But you can take care of you and your daughter. The hardest part is deciding, then all you have to do is follow through. You can do it.
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If you're not dead, you've still got time.
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I'm definitely in the "It's way over" stage, and I try to avoid him. I see him when I get home from work, that's about it. Just like when we were truly married.Plus, I'm going to have to see him every day-he does watch my child every weekday when I work! Two more years, and then she'll hardly ever see her daddy. 
He gets home at 1 AM and then ugh, last night sat on the computer litening to rap till 3AM. Looks like he also got drunk by himself. What a loser. Anyhow, I barely acknowledged him when he came home last night and boy did that feel good! If he thinks he still has a huge hold on me he's wrong. he just can't move out till months end, so I have to tough it out.
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Keep on keepin' on...
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