Really hard time :(
#243186 - 01/31/06 03:39 PM
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I am finally waking up from surgery and realizing what my new diagnoses mean and I'm having a super hard time dealing with it all 
If you want to know more about interstitial cystitis go to:
http://www.ic-network.com/
If you want to know more about vulvodynia go to:
http://www.ic-network.com/handbook/vulvodynia.html
I'm SO tired of being sick and having a million diagnoses and not being able to drive because we just upped my meds and living in pain. It's a lot for one girl to swallow and I don't want to go it alone.
And if you're wondering...no hubby and I can't have children and the way things are now adopting isn't an option either. I'm just too sick to care for a child when I can barely take care of myself.
If you have an extra hug today...can I have it? 
Thanks for reading *hugs*
Ruchie
P.S. I have therapy Thur. If things don't get better soon, I WILL be calling for an emergency appointment!
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Formerly known as Ruchie
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Oh ruchie...
I'm sorry you're having such a hard time reconciling this. I know that when I found out I had IBS I really had a hard time with it, and eventually, i ended up OK. It will happen. You have been through so much in your life, and you have the pain to show for it. It isn't fair, but we all love you very much. Hang in there, honey. It WILL get better.....
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Keep on keepin' on...
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BIG Hugs!
#243201 - 01/31/06 04:41 PM
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Bevvy
Reged: 11/04/03
Posts: 5918
Loc: Northwest Washington State
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Sweetie, my heart goes out to you. It IS a lot for a girl to swallow, I agree. I thought I had IC at one point, and went to the Urologist for an exam; thankfully, I do not have it.
You are very wise to realize you are too sick to care for a child right now, you have to care for YOU. Smart girl.
Ruchie, Don and I have lived a very happy married life for 39 years without children. It CAN be done. Of course, I do tend to throw myself into my knitting and kayaking, but that's okay too.
Please go to that class tomorrow and try to put your pain out of your mind. I think getting your mind focused on something else besides the pain is a good idea.
{{{{{{Hugs}}}}}}}}
Bevvy
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<img src="http://home.comcast.net/~letsrow/smily3481.gif">Bevvy
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You have to accept the loss of the life you thought might be yours and then once you mourn that, you can move on with the life you have been given.
I know that is how it was described to me as I was first learning to accept Luke's autism/asperger's diagnosis. And frankly I didn't go through that process for real until a good year after the diagnosis.
So... big hugs. You will move on from this point!!! hugs....
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Take care,
Michelle
...the greatest of these is LOVE. (I Cor 13)
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awww Ruchie! I don't have any answers, or profound things to say but i'm thinking of you in your time of need.
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****BIG HUGE HUGS******** I am so sorry you are suffering. You are such a sweetheart and please know that you are in my prayers. I also wanted to thank you for your message to me. I hope you got my e-mail.
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I wish I had some great words of comfort, but all I can do is offer *HUGS*. I'm sorry, sweetie.
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~~~Lisa~~~
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Here are big hugs for you Ruchie. You've been given a lot to deal with, give yourself time - and allow yourself to feel what your feeling without feeling down on yourself for being upset, or overwhelmed - Dan
I'm reading a very inspirational book - its called My Grandfather's Blessings by Rachel Naomi Remen. She is a doctor who has crohn's disease herself - she's a former head of pediatrics, who works counseling cancer patients. Its full of short stories of people she has worked with interspersed with recollections of her grandfather who was a rabbi who studied Kabbalah. (but this isn't a kabbalah book at all - not a book for the red string wearing Madonna types!) Not even especially Jewish - but very life-affirming. ANYWAY you might want to check it out at some point.
I just found a link with excerpts - http://www.rachelremen.com/mgb.html
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Ladies & gentlemen take my advice, pull down your pants and slide on the ice.
Edited by hawkeye (01/31/06 08:15 PM)
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Believe me, Ruchie, I can sympathize. I don't know when it gets easier. I'm really struggling, too. You can try to be as sparkly and witty and flippant as you want, but sooner or later you'll have red eyes and smudged mascara.
I'm not too sure how long you've been diagnosed with all of your conditions, but for me, it's dizzying and bewildering and painful to think back and know I was OK a couple years ago. I guess you just need to accept that, but I don't know how to accept it. And I'm not so sure you can really cope that well if you can't accept it.
As far as kids go -- the key phrase here is "the way things are now". Right now you are focusing on getting yourself well, and maybe later on down the road you WILL be well enough to care for a child. Don't slot yourself yet. I'm still all torn up right now because I have no idea if I'll be able to have kids, but I WILL adopt if I can't. And I WILL be well enough some day to do it! So maybe things suck right now -- but -- I was OK two years ago. Maybe in another two years I'll be OK. Who knows?
Anyway, I guess I don't have any sage words of advice, but I do know that just having surgery, no matter what it's treating, is rough in itself, and you need to give yourself time to heal. 2-4 weeks and you'll begin to lose the surgery side-effects. Be good to yourself in the meantime -- take it easy and take your pain pills.
Hang in there -- and go read some more books! I'm still waiting for those reviews.
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jen
"It's one of the most serious things that can possibly happen to one in a battle -- to get one's head cut off." -- LC
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Heather7476
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GIANT HUGS TO YOU! It'll be okay.
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***********************
If you're not dead, you've still got time.
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Honey, I had no idea you were going through so much. I have been away from the boards for a while, so I had no idea you no longer had a hubby. sorry about that, and everything else you are suffering through.
IT is true, just remember, you have been though a lot, most people suffer depression and helpless feelings after surgery, thats ok, it will go away in time. For right now, take care of yourself, rest, read, relax. Let that body heal. You never know where your life is going to be in 6mo, let alone a year! lots and lots of {{{{{HUGS}}}}} to you!!! Take care sweetie!!
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You have already gotten some really wonderful advice here. I just want to let you know I'm here and sending you lots of {{{{{Hugs!}}}}}
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Christine
Those who can do; those who want it done better teach.
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*HUG*
#243290 - 02/01/06 05:20 AM
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khyricat
Reged: 08/05/04
Posts: 3612
Loc: Michigan
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it is a grieving process but once you get past that you'll be ok!
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Dietetics Student (anticipating RD exam in Aug 2010)
IBS - A
Dairy Allergic
Fructose and MSG intollerant
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I am so sorry that you are having such a rough time. My prayers are with you and your husband. God bless you both.
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gentle *HUGS*
#243294 - 02/01/06 06:06 AM
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melitami
Reged: 02/23/04
Posts: 1213
Loc: Ewing, NJ, USA (IBS-D, Vegetarian)
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I'm so sorry, sweetie....I wish there were something I could do to make this easier for you. Know that your in my thoughts, and I'm sending you as much love, hugs, and happy thoughts as I can.
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Melissa
Friendship is thicker than blood. ~Rent
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Hugs, Ruchie
#243306 - 02/01/06 07:41 AM
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BL
Reged: 06/01/03
Posts: 3522
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I am so sorry you are having to go through all of this. This is an awful lot for one person to deal with. But you know you are not alone. We are always hear for you. I wish I could be there with you to give you a big hug.
I know that almost every time I have a procedure or surgery, I either sink into a depression or end up manic. Sometimes the anesthia or the meds they give you can do that to you. The is the bad thing about having BP. When I had that injection in my spine last year, I experienced a bad depression for about 2 weeks and fortunately, it went away as quickly as it came on.
I may have to have another cortisone injection, this time in my foot, and I talked to the doctor about this yesterday. He said it should be localized and not get into my entire system, but I'm still uneasy about it.
I understand what you are going through. You know you can email me anytime if you need to talk.
I hope you feel much better soon. You are a bright face on this board and I hate to "hear" you so down. It will get better soon! Hang in there! Big hugs.
I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
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I'm so sorry you're having to deal with all this, Ruchie. All I can say is that some days you crawl through and some days you dance through - I know when you're crawling, it seems like that's how it will always be, but nothing lasts forever. You will dance again.
Take care.
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[Research tells us fourteen out of any ten individuals likes chocolate. - Sandra Boynton]
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You're right, this ia A LOT for one person to handle. I'm so sorry that you have all of this on your shoulders. It's definitely not fair and it would be too much for anyone.
Big huge hugs!!! I hope your therapist can help you out sweetie.
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--------------------
Carol
nós somos o que nós somos e o descanso é merda
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*gentle hugs*, Ruchie! Thank you for providing the links so we can educate ourselves about what you're going through. I know there's not much I can do, but please know you're not alone. Lots of people are thinking about you and praying for you! 
Love,
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I'm sorry this is all so difficult for you. Anyone would be overwhelmed with all this. I know I get really down with all my diagnosis. I often wonder how one person can get so lucky!
Please take all our hugs for some comfort, sweetie. Are you sure you can't physically have children? I didn't think either of these diagnosis meant you couldn't have kids. But like Bev said, it smart that you realize now is not the time for kids. You need to care for Ruchie first.
I know it stinks not to be able to have kids. I struggle with this everyday, sweetie. It's not fair...bottom line!
But, as Bev said again, so wisely, it is possible to be happy without kids. My coworker cannot have children and she is sincerely happy and content. She has come to peace with it and has made fullilling life with her husband. And, as Michelle said too, we must allow ourselves to grieve the loss of the life we envisioned for ourselves before we can move on and accept the life we were given.
I don't know if this made you feel any better....but you are not alone! There are others, like moi, who have had similiar fears and sadness about all this.
How are you doing today? One more day until your therapy session.
we all love you, tons!
Big hugs...tons of hugs for you!
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~ Beth
Constipation, pain prodominent,cramps, spasms and bloat!
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Sweetie, I'm so sorry you are suffering so. We are all here for you! I wished I lived closer, I'd come cheer you up!!! Lots of really big, gentle hugs!
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Taking it one day at a time.....
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How are you doing today?
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Have a blessed day!...Rachel
stable and sooooooo thankful!
I have IBS but it doesn't have me!
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God is Faithful!
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{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}} a quote i heard "I"m sick and tired of being sick and tired"eXTRA BIG HUGS 
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Puppies Are Cute But I'm Cuter
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Thinking about you
#243475 - 02/01/06 04:35 PM
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Nelly
Reged: 08/06/04
Posts: 4381
Loc: Within stray mortar fire of DC
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{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS RUCHIE}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
~nelly~ 
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