Act of Kindness.
#231723 - 12/15/05 04:43 AM
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BarbaraS
Reged: 02/12/03
Posts: 1939
Loc: Wisconsin
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Many of us have had a stressful year, but I like you all to focus on either an act of kindness you did for somebody or an act of kindness done to you.
A group of people in my city started performing random acts of kindness with people on the street, at the mall. It was on the news again yesterday, which prompted this post this morning.
I'll post mine later - I have to head out to work in a few minutes.
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Nice thoughts
#231725 - 12/15/05 06:01 AM
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Linz
Reged: 09/01/03
Posts: 8242
Loc: England
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I won't post about mine (all WAY too complicated and/or private for the individuals concerned).
Random acts of kindness are great. It makes my day if someone just smiles at me.  Hmmm...maybe I need to get out more 
Happy holidays everyone!
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I take hubby's car out on the weekend to fill his tank with gas so he has a full tank to start the week off.
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Formerly HanSolo. IBS, OCD, Bipolar, PTSD times 3.
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Something I did:
I bought my work yoga teacher who donates her time to teach yoga here at work once a week on her lunch hour some orchids to thank her. She loved them!
Her act of kindness (in response to mine):
She is writing a letter of reference for me AND asked the editor of the newsletter I do to write me one too. So I will have two letters of recommendation!!!
YAY!
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Done for me: Mac pays my utility bills every month (without me ever asking him to, and in fact, with me being stubborn and asking him not to) since money is tight for me with my medical bills.
I did: random e-cards and occasional gifts to special people in my life who I unfortunately don't live close to.
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Melissa
Friendship is thicker than blood. ~Rent
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I know, I'm supposed to be taking a break from the boards, but I checked in this morning, saw this and had to respond.
Yesterday, I was at the post office and there was this Hispanic gentleman standing in front of the stamp machine. He looked so confused. He pointed at the book of stamps in the machine, held out his hand with a few coins, and tried to get me to explain if he had enough. He needed $7.20 ---and he probably only had about three dollars worth of coins. I tried to explain to him how much he needed, but he didn't understand (he didn't speak English very well.)
All of a sudden I remembered that I had bought 2 books of stamps earlier in the week (for Christmas cards)---and in the meantime, my husband and I decided not to send out cards this year. So I reached in my purse, got one of the book of stamps, and handed it to him. I said, "If you can use these, I want you to have them." The look on his face was priceless. You would've thought I handed him a million dollars! He went from sheer anguish to utter joy!
He stood there, shocked that someone had handed him what he needed. As I walked away, he hollered at me. I turned, and he was holding out his hand---with the small number of coins. I shook my head and told him, "No, I don't want those. I want you to have the stamps. They are my gift to you. Merry Christmas!"
The room got quiet, and I realized everyone had stopped their hustling and bustling to watch this exchange.
As I walked away, I heard the man say in his broken English, "Me-wwy Cwist-mas!"
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Great positive post Barbara!
For me:
When I was wedding planning I had a nightmare finding shoes to fit one of my sisters for her bridesmaids dress when we finally decided that the ones they had tried on first were the ones that we would go with. I got a shop to phone around and found them out in the suburbs. One of my friends went to collect them for me, then another friend met her and brought them home to me. I was so grateful I would have spend about three hours doing the same journey, whereas they split it between them.
When we were on honeymoon my Mum and brother came to our house and cleaned it from top to bottom and left a bunch of flowers and a "Welcome Home" sign on the table, and set our heating to come on as we arrived in, it was so great not to arrive in to the way we had left the house!
It's hard for me to isolate things this year as we got so much support from friends and family with wedding related help but these are just two examples.
By me:
When I'm ironing my stuff I iron an extra shirt for my husband so he doesn't have to do one in the morning, he HATES ironing (we do our own ironing usually) He is so delighted when he starts moaning in the morning about needing to iron a shirt and I tell him that there's one done hanging in the spare room.
Another very much appreciated thing that I have done recently that has been really commented on is that when I go to an event eg wedding, party etc I copy my digital photos onto CD and send them to the people who hosted the event, then they can have good quality (as opposed to uploaded versions of them all)
Little thoughtful things like those really make an impact on someone. Let's resolve that when someone is kind to us to post regularly and share the nice feeling of being helped out
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S.
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I think that we all need to remember and be thankful that we even have the Living Room. I'm sure it was a big risk for Heather to allow such an open forum. For the most part, I think it works fairly well. We have found friends, supported each other, comforted each other, and had good times here.
I don't know of many other boards that have such a thing.
I think the least thing we can do (our act of kindness to Heather) is to try to get along with each other as best we can and to respect each other's differences. The word tolerance is often misunderstood. The definition of tolerance includes not only to respect our differences, but also to put up with something even if it causes you great pain or distress. I say we need to go further than tolerance. We need to ACCEPT and RESPECT each others differences without pain or distress. I think we need to do our best to make this a forum where EVERYONE should feel welcome - regardless of gender, age, religion, etc. to name a few.
Just my two cents.
Heather is a generous, loving, caring individual. She does her very best to meet our needs even above and beyond the call of her duty. Please, let's all keep this in mind.
With love to all,
Alicia.
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Formerly HanSolo. IBS, OCD, Bipolar, PTSD times 3.
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I agree!! -nt-
#231764 - 12/15/05 08:38 AM
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Nelly
Reged: 08/06/04
Posts: 4381
Loc: Within stray mortar fire of DC
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That is so sweet.... {{tear in eye}}
Quote:
I know, I'm supposed to be taking a break from the boards, but I checked in this morning, saw this and had to respond.
Yesterday, I was at the post office and there was this Hispanic gentleman standing in front of the stamp machine. He looked so confused. He pointed at the book of stamps in the machine, held out his hand with a few coins, and tried to get me to explain if he had enough. He needed $7.20 ---and he probably only had about three dollars worth of coins. I tried to explain to him how much he needed, but he didn't understand (he didn't speak English very well.)
All of a sudden I remembered that I had bought 2 books of stamps earlier in the week (for Christmas cards)---and in the meantime, my husband and I decided not to send out cards this year. So I reached in my purse, got one of the book of stamps, and handed it to him. I said, "If you can use these, I want you to have them." The look on his face was priceless. You would've thought I handed him a million dollars! He went from sheer anguish to utter joy!
He stood there, shocked that someone had handed him what he needed. As I walked away, he hollered at me. I turned, and he was holding out his hand---with the small number of coins. I shook my head and told him, "No, I don't want those. I want you to have the stamps. They are my gift to you. Merry Christmas!"
The room got quiet, and I realized everyone had stopped their hustling and bustling to watch this exchange.
As I walked away, I heard the man say in his broken English, "Me-wwy Cwist-mas!"
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www.facebook.com/shell.marr
www.myspace.com/shellmarr
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Shell
#231777 - 12/15/05 09:28 AM
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BL
Reged: 06/01/03
Posts: 3522
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Thanks. It made my day...or holiday, should I say...to see the look on his face. Sometimes it's the little things that we do that make such a difference.
Every Christmas I think about this----
The first Christmas after our first son was born, I was exhausted. He was only 4 weeks old, and I hardly had time to sleep, much less do anything holiday-related. One of the women who worked with my husband sent home with him a tin full of holidays goodies (cookies, fudge, candy). Nothing had ever looked so good to me as that gift of homemade treats! It really made my Christmas special because I had no time to do any baking that year. I still think about this every Christmas.
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Oh goodness, where to begin? I honestly think about how blessed I am every single day, because I have friends in my life - some of whom I've never met - who are better than gold.
Some of them send me little random goodies, like the friend in L.A. who occasionally sends me skeins of expensive yarn that I'd never be able to afford on my own, just as a treat. Some take care of needs, like the one who, almost exactly a year ago, when I couldn't afford to buy pants that fit and I literally had none, went to the store, bought a few pairs, and sent them to me. One, my darling friend Erin, raids the dollar store for silly things that she knows will make me laugh, and sends them along. I can't even tell you how absolutely delightful it is to open your mailbox and see a surprise package from someone, just because they wanted to send a little something to let you know they were thinking of you.
I won't get into the kind things I've done, because I really don't like tooting my own horn quite that way, so I'll just say that I pass along the love shown to me as often as I possibly can.
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Eric and I have trouble getting away, seems 3 kids (one of whom is especially challenging) and a dog are a bit much for most folks. But we had a chacne to see the Panthers play Sunday, unusual for us, so we sure wanted to go. A couple from church heard of our predicament and offerred to take our kids!!! Out of nowhere!!! It's unlikely we will get the chance to return the favor, and they know that - it was just a gift of grace, a random act of kindness as you say. I'm so grateful, even though the Panthers played HORRIBLY it was so fun to scream at them in person!! 
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Take care,
Michelle
...the greatest of these is LOVE. (I Cor 13)
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That was a nice gift! I bet you enjoyed that (I'm envious!), although the Panthers did play pitifully.
I'd watch your kids if you lived closer to me. They are so cute!
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for putting my thoughts into words so eloquently *hugs*
I love you!!!
--------------------
Formerly known as Ruchie
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Yes, it is the little things....
My girlfriend still reminds me of Christmas when her and her two kids where little. The oldest was 4 and the youngest just over a year. Her husband had left her and she was not able to work full time due to the kids.
I took gifts over to her apartment... I had done a little better THAT year then years past...so I had money at Christmas for the first time living on my own. They were just little things like color books, crayons, big plastic piggy bank and some clothes... mommy got PJ's and slippers and chocolate for all. I had NO IDEA until YEARS later that those gifts that I had taken over to them WAS their Christmas!!
Quote:
Thanks. It made my day...or holiday, should I say...to see the look on his face. Sometimes it's the little things that we do that make such a difference.
Every Christmas I think about this----
The first Christmas after our first son was born, I was exhausted. He was only 4 weeks old, and I hardly had time to sleep, much less do anything holiday-related. One of the women who worked with my husband sent home with him a tin full of holidays goodies (cookies, fudge, candy). Nothing had ever looked so good to me as that gift of homemade treats! It really made my Christmas special because I had no time to do any baking that year. I still think about this every Christmas.
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www.facebook.com/shell.marr
www.myspace.com/shellmarr
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LOL!
#231859 - 12/15/05 02:11 PM
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atomic rose
Reged: 06/01/04
Posts: 7013
Loc: Maine (IBS-A stable since July '05!)
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Living in a small town, it's no big deal if someone smiles or even waves - we all do that, even if we don't know each other. But holy cow, if someone gets the DOOR for me, especially at the post office, I smile for the next hour! I always hold the door for the person behind me, and definitely always get the door for an elderly person, a mom with little kids, or anybody with their arms full... and sometimes they all just look so surprised that I did that.
Random acts of kindness don't even have to be something out of the ordinary - even common courtesy isn't so common anymore!
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Lovely post!
#231863 - 12/15/05 02:59 PM
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Stephie
Reged: 03/10/04
Posts: 2696
Loc: Vancouver, Canada
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Hi all,
What a nice idea for a post, this kind of stuff is so important to remember!
Stuff I've done.. um..
1) Sometimes I pretend I am still busy at work for an extra 15 minutes because there is another girl who is off 15 minutes after me who doesn't like to walk to her car alone, so I wait and walk with her even though it is the opposite direction I have to go to get home.
2) Arranged a trip over to Canada, then up to Whistler Mountain for Adrian's parents without Adrian ever knowing. I tried to arrange him to get time off and all that too, but his boss wouldn't give him any.. so he does not get on this list, hee hee.
3) When Adrian's Dad refused to leave a tip at a restaurant we went to last night because they didn't bring us our bread quick enough, my friend and I snuck back and left the waitress some money as our bill was probably around $150 and I know what it is like to live off tips.
That's all I can think of right now.
Stuff done for ME:
1) My union rep came to check up on me yesterday at work to make sure I was okay, which was nice.
2) Everyone on this board replying to my post about work, and helping me through so many difficult times I've gone through in the last couple of years.
3) Adrian's mum and I went out Christmas shopping and bought me a nice sweater as a gift because she saw me looking at it. Because she knows money is tight, she and Adrian's Dad have paid for a lot of our outing since they have been here before we can even try, which has been nice because I was worried the trip would almost bankrupt me!
I'm sure there are loads more,
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~~I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell-I know right now you can't tell~~Matchbox 20
IBS-D,pain.
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Glad to hear that someone at your work cares about your health/personal problems!
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I try to take the grocery carts in the parking lot lying around as my own cart if it was in someone's parking spot or in front of someone else's car.
I try to pick something up if someone drops it.
Or to share what I know with others.
I love visitng the elderly! I also smile at folks looking down who seem to be having a hard day...you can save a LIFE with a smile!! 
The best thing that's ever happened to me: People on the boards have sent me things...a stuffed dog, a pic of a dog, letters, cards, and even luna bars  
I have also lived in some wonderful Jewish Communities where when hubby and I moved into town, our meals were made for us for the ENTIRE WEEK! Not only did they make our meals...but they made them FOOD SAFE for me!!! 
Thanks for this thread Barbara!!! May all the kindness that is listed here be done for you *hugs*
P.S. How's your son doing??
--------------------
Formerly known as Ruchie
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Re: LOL!
#231888 - 12/15/05 04:07 PM
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Linz
Reged: 09/01/03
Posts: 8242
Loc: England
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See, I grew up in a village where everyone greeted people on the streets and I loved that. It's alot bigger and busier here and there is far less common courtesy.  But at least it's not as bad as Reading (the city near here I went to uni in) - that's nearly as bad as London in that if you smile at people on the street they think you're a loon! 
I wanna move back to the country!
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I can't think of anything off the top of my head that I did or someone did for me! Oh no! But, I will say is that it shouldn't not only be this time of year where we decide to do something kind for someone. It should be each and everyday of the year...
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My friend had twins who just turned 1 in Sept. and for the last year or so I've kinda adopted her 11 year old son to make her life a bit easier. (he also happens to be my son's best friend ) We took him home from CCD all of last year. He was on my son's baseball team in the fall so I picked him up every game and every practice and took him to the field. We also took him home most nights as it was hard for her to drag the twins out. I just offered whenever I could to help her out. This is her second marriage and she had these twins late in life and we all know our energy levels kinda drop after 35!!!!
She's managing to get through this tough time. She works full time and has the twin in daycare which costs about $1,000/mth!!!! She has a few years yet for it to get easier but however I can help out I offer and I never have minded doing it cause I look at my life as crazy but when I compare it to hers.........she's much more stressed!
Great post. Especially this time of year!!!
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~~~Lisa~~~
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Great point Tommy!!
Quote:
But, I will say is that it shouldn't not only be this time of year where we decide to do something kind for someone. It should be each and everyday of the year...
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www.facebook.com/shell.marr
www.myspace.com/shellmarr
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The first thing was when I stopped at a gas service to get some screen wash and a coffee my card got declined (this happens all the time to me, and I just called up Si who could sort it over the net) but a beautiful woman who had been behind me in the queue came up and asked if I was okay or if she could pay my bill for me! I said I was fine, but can you believe that? I mean, it wasn't much and she was obviously well off, but no-one does that.
And then I went to the Citizens Advice Bureau and 2 women (they're all volunteers) spent 3 hours with me filling in my disability forms.
And then when I stopped at a postbox on the way home I got locked out of the car (a combination of wind, a dog in the car and a dodgy lock). Luckily the window was slightly open, but I was trying unsuccessfully to get my keys out with a stick when a late middle aged couple pulled up, asked what the problem was and helped me get my keys. The lady spotted the crucial long stick with a strong hook in it and her husband got my keys! And they were so nice about it.
And THEN, when I finally got home, there was an early birthday card from my dad's cousin with 20 pounds in it! I can go buy some jeans without guilt now.
Today could have been incredibly stressful but it's been a GREAT day so far thanks to all these kind people. And now I get to go shopping for jeans (my last pair ripped across the bum this week ).
Edited by Linz (12/16/05 05:22 AM)
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not only have i been the recipient of the all parking meters in the block paid in full thing but I have done it to others....
also- I am running the drive through work for the local IHN shelter for homeless families to get christmas gifts as well as other needed items.
I'll be in on Monday loading my car to deliver everything.
and the nasty snow yesterday reminded me of a wonderful act from last year.. One of our neighbors had bought a new snowplow and he went out of his way to plow everyones drive in the first heavy snowfall.... Sadly he passed away very young this summer..
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Dietetics Student (anticipating RD exam in Aug 2010)
IBS - A
Dairy Allergic
Fructose and MSG intollerant
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I agree with you Tommy. It just seems this is the time of year people think about all the blessings they have had throughout the year.
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You are so sweet!! Usually it is the husband who fills the wife's car with gas. 
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Re: LOL!
#232134 - 12/16/05 02:11 PM
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BarbaraS
Reged: 02/12/03
Posts: 1939
Loc: Wisconsin
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I agree everyday kindness goes along way. I don't how many times a person lets go of a door on my face or not bother to help when I'm stuggling with 3 kids and groceries.
I am just like you. I hold the door open for people, help moms with small kids. Small acts of kindness really touch people's lives. The other thing I do is park further away from a store when I don't have my children - in hopes a mom with kids can park closer.
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I have been truly blessed this holiday. Everyday at work I seek situations on how I can touch a patients life. Today I washed two patients backs and gave them a back rub. Another patient was very crabby and mean to the other people I work with and I was determine to make him smile by the end of the day. I killed him with kindness and he smiled a couple of hours into my shift. I feel more blessed when I can make someone smile, feel better and a thankyou is all I need to know I touched somebody's life.
My hospital ask people to sign up every year if they want their family adopted, which is based on fincial need. My co-worker encouraged me to sign up and my boys and I were adopted. Words can not tell you how I feel right now. The group that adopted us were very generous. I didn't put myself down for gifts, and I have four presents to open on Chritmas.
The coolest thing is my adopted group were able to get a local company to donate 4 Milwaukee Buck tickets. These are $100.00 tickets each. I can not wait to take my kids to the game on Jan. 21rst. I can't wait to see the look on their faces.
There are so many things I am thankful for and people kindness has been overwhelming. One more thing. My nieghbor gave me a christmas tree she no longer uses when she found out I didn't have a christmas tree in my townhome.
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Shell that was a cool thing you did for your friend and her kids. A Christmas they will never forget.
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